What to do when no one agrees with your relationship?

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by Ronnie Tyler | on December 14th, 2007 | 6 comments

Have you ever been in a relationship with a person that your friends did not like for you? I have!! Sometimes they are right and sometimes they are dead wrong. It’s good to listen to your friends, but you have to understand what their motives are when they tell you negative things about your relationship like: 1. are they in a bad relationship right now, 2. are they bitter from a past relationship, 3. are they jealous??

Ultimately you must listen to your own inner voice. You know deep down inside if this person is right for you. And sometimes your friends can act as an hearing aid to help you hear that inner voice.

Check out what relationship expert, LaDawn Black, has to say on surviving naysayers when it comes to your relationship. Click Here

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About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and their latest documentary Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

Mihatt Media

Ultimately, you are all that matters in a relationship.
Your friends and family aren’t the ones who will live with this person. So often people want to please everybody around them and not themself. I say do you and if that means making others unhappy for your own happiness…so be it. I choose not to listen to others…I hear them, but make my own decisions base on my own feelings. You shouldn’t have to choose between your man or woman over your relationship with your friends. If they are true friends…they’ll be there for you and support you no matter what.
dwight hobbes

if they don’t agree with your relationship, they don’t have to be in it. let’m say their two cents and send them on their way to go mind somebody else’s business.

dh
http://myspace.com/1corinthians113 Shawntae Middleton

I f the people that matter (key word:matter) to you don’t care for the person you’re with, I think you should step back and assess the relationship. If he or she is such a great person eveyone would see that, not just you. Sometimes love can be blinding! Of course the ultimate decision is yours, but who wants to be in a relationship with someone that everyone thinks is no good for you. Living the rest of your life with someone noone wants around would be awful to me.
Always listen to wise counsel.
http://www.blackandmarriedwithkids.com TheDad

Just because people are your friends doesn’t mean they necesarrily know whats best for you or even have your best interest at mind
http://www.blackandmarriedwithkids.com TheDad

That was a response to Shawntae’s comment
http://myspace.com/kavika_sign Kavika

If the criticism is based on what that person is saying about ME -I listen. The person must be a trusted Family Member or a Wise elder.

If the criticism is derogatory or spiteful , I regard the person as trifling and jealous. ex: when I was a teen – among my friends I was the grand adventurer and uninhibited in approaching the choicest females. I had one friend who would always – no matter which girl it was- refer to the girl as a Ho – or some other inappropriate name.

Once at a birthday party a BEAUTIFUL young lady from out of town walked in and because everyone’s Parents were so familiar I thought she was His Cousin or distant relative or something. She automatically showed interest – and the rest goes in the annals of Kavikadom – and everyone seemed to be OK with the predictable outcome of the whole event!

All accept this one friend. Little did I know – she wasn’t His Cousin , and He had a MAJOR crush on the girl. I found out over 25 years later that – 1. she wasn’t his cousin
2. he held that against Me
3. he had this major crush on this girl He spoke so BADLY of…….

So – it depends. We’re all still friends, but I have learned to regard – even my own Brother warily when they have something to say about my Love Interests or relationship!