In response to: Why don’t married couples wear their rings?

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by Lamar Tyler | on January 17th, 2008 | 6 comments

Some reader responses:

“CS- My opinion if you’re married you don’t wear your ring you are trying to hide something. You either don’t have a ring for some odd reason or you just don’t want to be married or you want to have your cake and eat it too. I love showing off that I’m married because my husband is wonderful and he’s the best husband ever.”

“Big J- Personally, I don’t like to be seen without my wedding ring. For me, I just feel more stately when I’ve got my ring on. As a black man, I also feel like I’m setting a good example when I have it on.

My wife is pregnant and her fingers are swelling so much that she’s had to take her ring off. We both went downtown and got her a faux replacement because I don’t want her looking like somebody’s baby mama.”

“KJ- My ring was not the best but it was what it symbolized was what counts”.

About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

Lolly

My husband and I are going on our 20th wedding anniversary. I was 21 when I got married and he was 23. This is the first marriage for both of us. We have seven children ages 4 to 18. We have never wore a wedding ring because of our religious beliefs on jewlry. We had a big wedding that did not include placing a ring on each other’s finger. It’s not the ring that holds you together. It’s the vows you made before almighty God and man. We have been faithful to each other. Your conduct in public should let the opposite sex know that you are married. I trust him and he trusts me. Looking forward to many more years with the man of my life.
Misbeehavin

Thats the point I was trying to get at in the last post. Some couples don’t wear their rings for numerous reasons, but as long as you still carry yourself as a married person you will be fine. Wearing the ring doesn’t stop the man/woman from cheating, and it doesn’t stop other individuals from trying to see if you would cheat.
Jonesi

As long as I am able, my ring will be on my finger! Not as a reminder for others but a symbol btw my future husband declaring his love eternally. I look down sometimes at my ring with joy praising God for his presence. To be honest, because I was never married, I’m not sure how I would feel about his commitment sans ring considering he has made plently of costly purchases before me. It’s not the ring as much as it symbolizes the sacrifice of savings versus his love and dedication.
http://stellarsassysocial.blogspot.com elle denise

@Lolly: love it!

elle denises last blog post..Family Fun: 100 Free Things to Do with Your (Grand)Kids!
Harriet

@ jonesi

you said: “It’s not the ring as much as it symbolizes the sacrifice of savings versus his love and dedication.”

could u explain that? i’m not sure i understood what u meant.
Jonesi

@Harriet- take the versus out (that’s what happens when I write from a blackberry). In a nutshell all I mean is in my case (my relationship alone) my fiance is a calculated spender. His love isn’t measured by the ring, but to know he sacrificed to save for it was a very much appreciated gesture – and for him, I know he would have rather spent it on something else. Like in Fireproof, he got her those raggedy flowers because his heart wasn’t in it, he was just doing it because he had to, but when he got some really beautiful flowers, which for him was a very big deal, it was well received and moreso because of him coming out of himself to place value in something he really could care less about.