Comments on: Guest Post:Sista, Where Art Thou? : The Missing Link In Critical Self-Thought About Black America. http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america Promoting Positive Images of Marriage and Parenting Since 2007 Mon, 13 Feb 2012 00:17:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: key-2-life http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2981 key-2-life Wed, 30 Jul 2008 20:37:09 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2981 You didn't lose me! I am a woman and I'm so tired of hearing other women constantly putting everything on the black man. If they’re too successful, then he is intimated by them. Or better yet, if they are too loose by giving up the goodies, then he is a dog if he doesn’t take care of his responsibility! I’m just like damn!!! When will women step up and realize that majority of the things men do is because they allow it? By no means am I saying that there are no cruddy dudes. But come on, why is it no fault when she has messed up? I can’t believe that every man that a women has gotten pregnant, played or hurt by didn’t throw a sign or two before they got caught up. That is the wonderful thing about choices! Just how we choose to be stupid at times, we can also choose to be smart. Like the good old saying goes, “Fool me once shame on you, but fool me twice shame on ME!” It does not say fool me twice and still shame on you regardless because I not wrong!!! Come on women…it’s time to have some shame for your sh*t. You didn’t lose me! I am a woman and I’m so tired of hearing other women constantly putting everything on the black man. If they’re too successful, then he is intimated by them. Or better yet, if they are too loose by giving up the goodies, then he is a dog if he doesn’t take care of his responsibility! I’m just like damn!!! When will women step up and realize that majority of the things men do is because they allow it? By no means am I saying that there are no cruddy dudes. But come on, why is it no fault when she has messed up? I can’t believe that every man that a women has gotten pregnant, played or hurt by didn’t throw a sign or two before they got caught up. That is the wonderful thing about choices! Just how we choose to be stupid at times, we can also choose to be smart. Like the good old saying goes, “Fool me once shame on you, but fool me twice shame on ME!” It does not say fool me twice and still shame on you regardless because I not wrong!!! Come on women…it’s time to have some shame for your sh*t.

]]> By: Teems http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2975 Teems Wed, 30 Jul 2008 17:26:01 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2975 I watched this program and others from time to time but I never get offended. I have witness many of the stereotypes/facts first hand. In my opinion, it is all about choice and not necessarily about the limited opportunities. Opportunities can be created and molded. Both my parents started their lives very well and strayed down the wrong paths. They are no longer alive and fall into some the statistics on this show. And guess what? I have never lived in “hood”. At least not the kind depicted on TV. But its TV, they are going to only show two extremes. I look at my family and I see no negative history or trickle down effect that could have led to their actions. I am sure my grandparents feel they have failed but that was my own parent’s choice (for whatever reason) to live they way they did. Now aside from being an “Orphan” I have been through many trials and tribulations and my head is still attached to my shoulders. I have no children, I have a job, and decent education and wonderful man whom I wish to marry one day. How do I do it? I live my life trying NOT to be like my parents or the crap I see on TV. Reaching for the goals my parents once had. Being the person that my mother/father could have been…. Choosing my own path was the only thing I ever had control over. I surrounded my self with positive people. I have had my share of no good people and made mistakes but I learn and moved on. So strangely, I have to agree with The Dad. There is a general understanding of what is right and what is wrong. It is up to the individual to choose. Drug dealers know that the right thing to do is get a legal job but they are infatuated with “fast money”. There are consequences for all these negative actions and they know that. Clearly are or know the same people suffering with disease, addiction, and incarceration. For some reason, they still do it. To this day I still do not understand how one could witness consequences first or second hand and still choose the wrong path. Teemss last blog post..<a href="http://blogitteems.blogspot.com/2008/07/do-we-buy-products-or-lifestyles.html" rel="nofollow">Do we buy products or a lifestyles?</a> I watched this program and others from time to time but I never get offended. I have witness many of the stereotypes/facts first hand. In my opinion, it is all about choice and not necessarily about the limited opportunities. Opportunities can be created and molded.

Both my parents started their lives very well and strayed down the wrong paths. They are no longer alive and fall into some the statistics on this show. And guess what? I have never lived in “hood”. At least not the kind depicted on TV. But its TV, they are going to only show two extremes. I look at my family and I see no negative history or trickle down effect that could have led to their actions. I am sure my grandparents feel they have failed but that was my own parent’s choice (for whatever reason) to live they way they did.

Now aside from being an “Orphan” I have been through many trials and tribulations and my head is still attached to my shoulders. I have no children, I have a job, and decent education and wonderful man whom I wish to marry one day. How do I do it? I live my life trying NOT to be like my parents or the crap I see on TV. Reaching for the goals my parents once had. Being the person that my mother/father could have been…. Choosing my own path was the only thing I ever had control over. I surrounded my self with positive people. I have had my share of no good people and made mistakes but I learn and moved on. So strangely, I have to agree with The Dad. There is a general understanding of what is right and what is wrong. It is up to the individual to choose. Drug dealers know that the right thing to do is get a legal job but they are infatuated with “fast money”. There are consequences for all these negative actions and they know that. Clearly are or know the same people suffering with disease, addiction, and incarceration. For some reason, they still do it. To this day I still do not understand how one could witness consequences first or second hand and still choose the wrong path.

Teemss last blog post..Do we buy products or a lifestyles?

]]> By: Ruby128 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2974 Ruby128 Wed, 30 Jul 2008 13:47:40 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2974 Wow! This one left me a little speechless at first because the tone comes off a little harsh...but.....there are some valid points here to take heed to because as adults both men and women do have the responsiblity to make choices that are best for us and our children. But i still didn't hear any 'solutions' in this rant as well, for example...how do we get the black church to engage in more classes, how do we teach our young people about being responsible, etc, etc....we all know the issues, but we still haven't come together to fix the "how" and until we do that, we will still have the same issues. Wow! This one left me a little speechless at first because the tone comes off a little harsh…but…..there are some valid points here to take heed to because as adults both men and women do have the responsiblity to make choices that are best for us and our children. But i still didn’t hear any ‘solutions’ in this rant as well, for example…how do we get the black church to engage in more classes, how do we teach our young people about being responsible, etc, etc….we all know the issues, but we still haven’t come together to fix the “how” and until we do that, we will still have the same issues.

]]> By: SweetNatty http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2972 SweetNatty Wed, 30 Jul 2008 10:57:18 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2972 3 children by 5 wpmen - how is that possible? 3 children by 5 wpmen – how is that possible?

]]> By: Nicole http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2971 Nicole Wed, 30 Jul 2008 10:44:16 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2971 You didn't lose me:) I think that both black men and black women need to step up. We are at the point that we need to take responsibility for our own actions. I won't comment on the series because I did not watch it. My husband taped some of it it but I have not looked at any of it yet because I figured it would be bashing someone, even with the people on the panel. Why do we even have to have these types of shows. I wonder what was the racial breakdown of the viewers. It was probably mostly black people. Was the show for black people or to state our case to other races? Black people know what they have to do and we don't need a show to tell us where we have been, what we are doing now, or what we need to do in the future. We just need to do it. Nicoles last blog post..<a href="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/JustMeLiving/~3/350373665/mom-show-some-authori-ti.html" rel="nofollow">Mom, Show some Authori-Ti!</a> You didn’t lose me:) I think that both black men and black women need to step up. We are at the point that we need to take responsibility for our own actions. I won’t comment on the series because I did not watch it. My husband taped some of it it but I have not looked at any of it yet because I figured it would be bashing someone, even with the people on the panel. Why do we even have to have these types of shows. I wonder what was the racial breakdown of the viewers. It was probably mostly black people. Was the show for black people or to state our case to other races? Black people know what they have to do and we don’t need a show to tell us where we have been, what we are doing now, or what we need to do in the future. We just need to do it.

Nicoles last blog post..Mom, Show some Authori-Ti!

]]> By: T. Rogers http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2969 T. Rogers Tue, 29 Jul 2008 22:58:25 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2969 I thought the series was decent. When no one does any stories about us folks say we are being ignored. When someone sets out to do a story people complain. I think the goal of the show was to present black Americans in a realistic way. Now defining 'realistic' is another story. We are a complex people. A fluffy, super positive portrayal would have been a flat out lie, as would an overly negative piece. I do not think this was either. I do agree with some of your points regarding women. I am not sure criticizing women more is the answer. However, the shortcomings do need to be pointed out. I think black women need to get beyond the superwoman thing and realize their own limits. Single motherhood is heroic, however it is not very smart. Based on some of the choices some women make in men many are literally choosing single motherhood. Both black women and black men have some work to do. I thought the series was decent. When no one does any stories about us folks say we are being ignored. When someone sets out to do a story people complain. I think the goal of the show was to present black Americans in a realistic way. Now defining ‘realistic’ is another story. We are a complex people. A fluffy, super positive portrayal would have been a flat out lie, as would an overly negative piece. I do not think this was either.

I do agree with some of your points regarding women. I am not sure criticizing women more is the answer. However, the shortcomings do need to be pointed out. I think black women need to get beyond the superwoman thing and realize their own limits. Single motherhood is heroic, however it is not very smart. Based on some of the choices some women make in men many are literally choosing single motherhood. Both black women and black men have some work to do.

]]> By: Na http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/comment-page-1#comment-2966 Na Tue, 29 Jul 2008 21:04:51 +0000 http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2008/07/29/guest-postsista-where-art-thou-the-missing-link-in-critical-self-thought-about-black-america/#comment-2966 Damn, you sound awful bitter! How can you write a blog on somehting you didn't even watch?? I think it's funny that black folks are so upset about this program. I knew most of that stuff before I watched the show. Would it make you feel better if they lied and said that blacks were doing great and everything was equal among races. Yeah, it was kinda one-sided in regards to the black man, but who's gonna argue that if more black men were in the home or taking care of their children that things would be better. I agree that woman need to check themselves before they mess with sorry men but like you said it takes two, so the man needs to step up regardless. Totally agree with you regarding Soledad though, she's very phony. I wish someone else would've done the segment. Anderson Cooper would've done a much better job. Damn, you sound awful bitter! How can you write a blog on somehting you didn’t even watch??

I think it’s funny that black folks are so upset about this program. I knew most of that stuff before I watched the show. Would it make you feel better if they lied and said that blacks were doing great and everything was equal among races. Yeah, it was kinda one-sided in regards to the black man, but who’s gonna argue that if more black men were in the home or taking care of their children that things would be better.

I agree that woman need to check themselves before they mess with sorry men but like you said it takes two, so the man needs to step up regardless.

Totally agree with you regarding Soledad though, she’s very phony. I wish someone else would’ve done the segment. Anderson Cooper would’ve done a much better job.

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