Financial Questions To Ask Before Saying “I Do”

Money

by Lamar Tyler | on November 25th, 2008 | 3 comments

We’ve got another list. I really like this one this time around. We touched on this a while back but I don’t think I can stress the importance of finances in a relationship. I believe that I’ve heard that money is one of the biggest reasons why people divorce so pay attention singles. Me and TheMom have two different approaches towards money. We both spend in two opposite ways and are tight in two opposite ways so I think we balance each other out. What she spends on I look at her like she’s crazy and the things I want to spend on she does the same so it makes both of us think twice before we purchase. The list is from yahoo.com and here it is along with some text from the article. To see a full explanation of each point go here.

When couples come together, they bring different approaches to money and often different lessons learned about handling money. Guaranteed, money will always be difficult to talk about as a couple and will often be the source of disagreements that lead to arguments. If you start the money conversation before marriage, you’ll likely get off to a better start than many couples.

1. How many accounts do you have, and what kind are they? (Checking, savings, money markets?)
2. How many credit cards do you have, and how do you use them?
3. What other debt do you have?
4. Have you checked your credit score lately?
5. Should we have separate, joint, or separate and joint accounts?
6. Should we set and follow a monthly budget?
7. How will we make buying decisions?
8. Who will be responsible for paying bills and preparing taxes?
9. Do our work benefits overlap, and do you have insurance?
10. What are our money goals?

BMWK what do you think of the list above? Do you think money is a major problem in relationships that fail? What is the main questions couples should ask each other before marriage in terms of finances? What have you done in your relationship to come to a common understanding in regards to money?

About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

E.R.

I think those are questions to ask way before you even to start thinking about marriage. I think when you are thinking about getting into a serious relationship you should ask those questions. My bf, of 5 years, and I are on the opposite spectrum when discussing money. He’s a spender and I’m a saver. We’ve lived together and I became the financial person, becuase really if it were up to him we would be in the poor house. We discuss major purchases ($100+) together. It think if we were ever to get together we would have 1 joint account for bills and seperate accounts for personal spending becuase otherwise there would be major fights and I have way better credit than he does (his mother screwed his credit up big time). PARENTS PLEASE DON’T MESS WITH YOUR CHILDREN’s CREDIT!!!
E.R.

I think if we were ever to get MARRIED we would have 1 joint account for bills and seperate accounts for personal spending becuase otherwise there would be major fights and I have way better credit than he does (his mother screwed his credit up big time). PARENTS PLEASE DON’T MESS WITH YOUR CHILDREN’s CREDIT!!!
Jonesti

I struggle with this topic because I feel this is one of those things that can be worked out and shouldn’t be a deal breaker in a relationship when trying to determine if you should marry an individual. Yes credit and financial standing is important, but I think it’s a bit superficial to eliminate a person based on their finances. Now I can admit no one wants a broke mate but it is also important to assess their earning potential and future goals. Something that has always stuck with me was a man I respected and admired once told me to ask a man his credit score before we start dating and if it isn’t up to par move on. Well needless to say while he is very well off and a top exec at a major corporation, he is in the middle of a messy divorce…..so the moral of the story is don’t get caught up in wordly credentials and let that override your love for one another.