I wish I would have been able to read your comment before. I didn’t realize you’d left a comment, so my apologies for not getting back sooner. I just want to request that you please take the time to read through my whole response before getting back with me.

Your choice of language pretty much made my point for me. Since when is life fair? It’s not fair that men have sperm and women have to be pregnant 9 months and then get busted wide open to have a baby. LIFE AIN’T FAIR.

Divorce isn’t fair, either, but Christ gave a stipulation that made it possible because people’s hearts were hard.

Why can’t a woman have a chaste man? Why is it OK for a man to sow his “wild oats,” but if a woman does the same, she’s labeled a whore? Why can’t our common denominator be abstinence and celibacy prior to marriage. If that was the culture, we woudln’t even be having this discussion.

It’s also not a choice if a woman has to pay what they now call “manimony” and child support, because if they don’t, they’ll go to jail as well.

I mean, there’s a double standard any way you shake it, so when is someone going to take the high ground?

As far as Christianity is concerned, one thing Christ will not usurp is the gift He gave man to make his own choices. I’m not talking about religion here. I’m talking about the Spirit of Christ.

I guess I don’t understand what you’re so upset about. This article was designed to help married couples resolve their isues in a mature manner. Your entire comment was regarding separation, dysfunction and divorce.

Whatever you’re going through or have gone through, please trust and believe that not every woman shares the same mindset that you outlined in your commentary. Every woman is not manipulative, conniving and dishonest.

If you feel emasculated–and please pardon my candor, but I really don’t know any other way to put it–repossess your testicles from whomever you gave them to and start living again. Christ didn’t die for you to spend your life embittered over your broken heart or the argumentative nature of your past (or current) relationship. He came that you might have life adn that more abundantly!

LIVE! Don’t let rigor mortis settle into your heart that was designed to love, nurture and protect a woman. It will slowly kill you if you do.

But I bet it’s not a choice for a man to have to pay alimony/child support/divorce (because if he doesn’t he goes to jail). How fair is it that women get a choice to be submissive or dominant (chaste or not), when those things are clearly stated in the Christian religion? Why can’t a man have an honest and chaste woman (lieing about their “number”)? Why are they always so ashamed/embarrassed of their past? If you’re ashamed of your past, then that’s a sign you shouldn’t have been doing it and that it’s wrong. Why do men have to just take in all of woman’s bull or else face consequences, but a woman does not have to take any from a man (she can just say she’s bored or cheat or have babies by different men and she won’t be held accountable for it, since she can just say “irreconcilable difference”)? NOT FAIR!

I wasn’t trying to assert that a man is not supposed to be the head of the household. The point I was trying to make is that it doesn’t do a disagreement any good for a man to tell a woman what she already knows in a Christian marriage. There’s a huge difference between MINISTERING the Word of God and just THROWING it at someone as a weapon. Sometimes Christians confuse when we’re supposed to use the Word as a weapon and when we’re supposed to use it as water to cleanse and rejuvenate.

As far as submission is concerned, it does not come through intimidation and control. It comes through loving a woman strongly enough that she would WANT to submit. It’s a choice for a woman, just like serving Christ is a choice for every individual.

Social order calls for a wife to be submissive. Now I’m not saying if a husband gets out of line to just let it slide, but don’t talk over or ignore him because that can be emasculating. We want to marry feminine women, not masculine ones.

Peace & blessings,

L. J.

Yeah, the housework thing has definitely been a bone of contention in our home. I’ve learned to laugh at things and take them with stride, but I can’t stand how cluttered our house is. However, I’m not about to wear myself out going to work all day, coming home, cooking, taking care of our son, cleaning…something has got to give. I’m all about sharing the load, so whenever my husband decides to do so, then our home will be neater. In the meantime, we just ain’t having company! LOL