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	<title>Comments on: How Do We Handle Our Daughters?</title>
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		<title>By: ewok</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11568</link>
		<dc:creator>ewok</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Mar 2009 15:56:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11568</guid>
		<description>Thanks for the point of view Regina. It is a problem across the board and parents just need ot be more involved in their child&#039;s life. 

I got away with a lot of things as a teeneager with my mother&#039;s foot planted squarely in my behind....imagine if it was not there at all! LOL!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks for the point of view Regina. It is a problem across the board and parents just need ot be more involved in their child&#8217;s life. </p>
<p>I got away with a lot of things as a teeneager with my mother&#8217;s foot planted squarely in my behind&#8230;.imagine if it was not there at all! LOL!</p>
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		<title>By: Regina</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11563</link>
		<dc:creator>Regina</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Mar 2009 14:58:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11563</guid>
		<description>As a white reader of this blog, I just wanted to make sure it is out there that this is NOT a problem of Black America, it&#039;s a problem in America generally. I saw several years ago a statistic saying that 95% of 15-year-old girls had given a boy oral sex (and what makes it even more twisted, only 5% had GOTTEN oral sex from a boy -- what are they doing it for??). They didn&#039;t get to 95% by starting at age 15, they have to be starting a lot younger than that. That freaks me out! I was 15 in 1982, and I was skipping school and smoking pot and popping pills and just generally f*d up, and even I didn&#039;t lose my virginity until I was 16, but back then that was really young. And I know I was damaged by it. I don&#039;t have any kids, but I have a 16-year-old niece, and she&#039;s a very good kid, but still ... I just get sick with worry. And the Catholic schools are no better. I would not want to have kids if I couldn&#039;t home school them! And no TV!

And I totally agree that throwing these girls in adult prison is as wrong or worse than what the girls themselves did.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>As a white reader of this blog, I just wanted to make sure it is out there that this is NOT a problem of Black America, it&#8217;s a problem in America generally. I saw several years ago a statistic saying that 95% of 15-year-old girls had given a boy oral sex (and what makes it even more twisted, only 5% had GOTTEN oral sex from a boy &#8212; what are they doing it for??). They didn&#8217;t get to 95% by starting at age 15, they have to be starting a lot younger than that. That freaks me out! I was 15 in 1982, and I was skipping school and smoking pot and popping pills and just generally f*d up, and even I didn&#8217;t lose my virginity until I was 16, but back then that was really young. And I know I was damaged by it. I don&#8217;t have any kids, but I have a 16-year-old niece, and she&#8217;s a very good kid, but still &#8230; I just get sick with worry. And the Catholic schools are no better. I would not want to have kids if I couldn&#8217;t home school them! And no TV!</p>
<p>And I totally agree that throwing these girls in adult prison is as wrong or worse than what the girls themselves did.</p>
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		<title>By: Alicia</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11542</link>
		<dc:creator>Alicia</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Mar 2009 02:04:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11542</guid>
		<description>How completely sad! ARELIA is so right! I just had a talk with my 16-year-old after we watched this clip. This is so not an isolated case. She told me about some things that happen on her HS campus and this just solidified her concerns about her friends and her friend&#039;s friends. When I taught at her school a few weeks ago I learned that 60% of their blood donations had to be thrown out because they were tainted with several STDs including HIV!!! I have to admit I&#039;ve been asleep at the wheel when it comes to my parenting &#039;cos like most I don&#039;t want to believe that such things are taking place. However, I&#039;m fully awake now and rudely shaking up my mama network as well as the neighborhood because as we all have pointed out that WE created this problem with our own actions at home. None of us were angels back then and we&#039;ve got to realize that the devil is clipping wings right and left!!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How completely sad! ARELIA is so right! I just had a talk with my 16-year-old after we watched this clip. This is so not an isolated case. She told me about some things that happen on her HS campus and this just solidified her concerns about her friends and her friend&#8217;s friends. When I taught at her school a few weeks ago I learned that 60% of their blood donations had to be thrown out because they were tainted with several STDs including HIV!!! I have to admit I&#8217;ve been asleep at the wheel when it comes to my parenting &#8216;cos like most I don&#8217;t want to believe that such things are taking place. However, I&#8217;m fully awake now and rudely shaking up my mama network as well as the neighborhood because as we all have pointed out that WE created this problem with our own actions at home. None of us were angels back then and we&#8217;ve got to realize that the devil is clipping wings right and left!!</p>
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		<title>By: Sasha</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11513</link>
		<dc:creator>Sasha</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 02 Mar 2009 13:06:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11513</guid>
		<description>Ok...OUR system has failed them, but WE ARE OUR SYSTEM.  The government does not put fast food chains in our neighborhoods, entrepreneurial people put them there.

The government does not create all of these stories and songs about pimpin&#039; and hoin&#039;, our people are doing it, and WE ARE BUYING IT, and letting our children listen to it...

The government did not make us buy a DTV or make us PAY for denigrating stations like BET, WE CALLED AND INSTALLED THESE CHANNELS OURSELVES, and PAY EXTRA FOR THEM!!!

Amen to Ariela in saying let&#039;s take back our communities, our schools, our pride, our legacy, and show our children a different way.

LET&#039;S TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for ourselves, our neighborhoods, our schools, and ourselves, and STOP BLAMING OTHERS FOR THE STATE THEY ARE IN!!!

Let&#039;s stop teaching our kids to blame others and take responsibility for themselves.  Let&#039;s create a world that we are proud to live in, and a world that we are proud and happy to leave for our kids.

:)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Ok&#8230;OUR system has failed them, but WE ARE OUR SYSTEM.  The government does not put fast food chains in our neighborhoods, entrepreneurial people put them there.</p>
<p>The government does not create all of these stories and songs about pimpin&#8217; and hoin&#8217;, our people are doing it, and WE ARE BUYING IT, and letting our children listen to it&#8230;</p>
<p>The government did not make us buy a DTV or make us PAY for denigrating stations like BET, WE CALLED AND INSTALLED THESE CHANNELS OURSELVES, and PAY EXTRA FOR THEM!!!</p>
<p>Amen to Ariela in saying let&#8217;s take back our communities, our schools, our pride, our legacy, and show our children a different way.</p>
<p>LET&#8217;S TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for ourselves, our neighborhoods, our schools, and ourselves, and STOP BLAMING OTHERS FOR THE STATE THEY ARE IN!!!</p>
<p>Let&#8217;s stop teaching our kids to blame others and take responsibility for themselves.  Let&#8217;s create a world that we are proud to live in, and a world that we are proud and happy to leave for our kids.</p>
<p> <img src='http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
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		<title>By: PerfectLocks</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11496</link>
		<dc:creator>PerfectLocks</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 01 Mar 2009 18:06:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11496</guid>
		<description>How tragic that these girls had such low self esteem that they thought this type of behavior was okay. They obviously have some brains to put together an operation like that and I agree that punishing them with incarceration with adults is probably not the best solution. Our system has failed them and will most likely fail them again.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How tragic that these girls had such low self esteem that they thought this type of behavior was okay. They obviously have some brains to put together an operation like that and I agree that punishing them with incarceration with adults is probably not the best solution. Our system has failed them and will most likely fail them again.</p>
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		<title>By: Shay</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11487</link>
		<dc:creator>Shay</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 01 Mar 2009 01:48:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11487</guid>
		<description>the story didn&#039;t surprise me. these girls are not the first and they won&#039;t be the last. 

this is a community issue. 

thanks to all the people that are working in our communities to help our babies. i would encourage each of us to make sure that we are giving of ourselves, not only to our own kids, but to every person that we come in contact with. 

i created Bigger Than Your Block as a way to share information about money management with youth. as others have stated, giving our kids a way to get and keep money is way to encourage them to start thier own legal businesses and have pride in thier communities. 

if anyone is in Los Angeles, San Diego, or Philly/New York and would like to work together on a community project let me know. 

PEACE,
Shay Olivarria
President
Bigger Than Your Block</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>the story didn&#8217;t surprise me. these girls are not the first and they won&#8217;t be the last. </p>
<p>this is a community issue. </p>
<p>thanks to all the people that are working in our communities to help our babies. i would encourage each of us to make sure that we are giving of ourselves, not only to our own kids, but to every person that we come in contact with. </p>
<p>i created Bigger Than Your Block as a way to share information about money management with youth. as others have stated, giving our kids a way to get and keep money is way to encourage them to start thier own legal businesses and have pride in thier communities. </p>
<p>if anyone is in Los Angeles, San Diego, or Philly/New York and would like to work together on a community project let me know. </p>
<p>PEACE,<br />
Shay Olivarria<br />
President<br />
Bigger Than Your Block</p>
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		<title>By: Anna</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11468</link>
		<dc:creator>Anna</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Feb 2009 02:30:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11468</guid>
		<description>Arelia,
AMEN!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Arelia,<br />
AMEN!</p>
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		<title>By: Arelia</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11462</link>
		<dc:creator>Arelia</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Feb 2009 19:23:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11462</guid>
		<description>I was forwarded a link that brought me to this sight. I was totally taken aback by the film I saw. But what is it that pisses me off more? The fact that TWO black children are being tried as adults? or the situation they found them selves in? I agree with the sentiments of every individual who had the courage to comment. This is a social thing, a communal thing, an economic thing, a hope thing, a black thing and a white thing, this is a parent involvement thing as well as Psychological.

Any child that has the sense and the know how to hustle money, get hoes(excuse the expression), rent an apartment, and then be intelligent enough to know and admit a problem is not a child who belongs in a correctional facility. Because we all know that those facilities do not correct anything, they only make matters worse.

I am going to step out on a limb and say &quot;Be like Sister Sasha&quot; give up some of your time to our youth. I always hear the elders say, &quot;it takes a village.&quot; But the villagers are not responding. WE the people are responsible for this. The government told you to get DTV or else and WE did. Instead of being courageous and defiantly saying no. lets just turn the damn thing off. The government poisons OUR neighborhoods with fast food chains and half empty grocery stores. Instead of standing up against the toxins, we feed it to our children and ourselves on a daily basis. Not once have I heard of a community demanding a well stocked clean and healthy grocer for their neighborhood. Instead of monitoring the activities of our children, we buy them cell phones, and two ways, pagers, and the internet. 

When will it stop? and When will we come together as a community STAND, TAKE ACTION, and SAY NO MORE? WE ARE TAKING BACK OUR CHILDREN, OUR SCHOOLS, OUR PRIDE, OUR TRADITION, OUR LEGACY. DON&#039;T CROSS THESE TRACKS UNLESS YOU ARE BRINGING SOMETHING POSITIVE; BECUASE IF YOU ARE NOT STAY THE HELL AWAY.

PeaZe</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I was forwarded a link that brought me to this sight. I was totally taken aback by the film I saw. But what is it that pisses me off more? The fact that TWO black children are being tried as adults? or the situation they found them selves in? I agree with the sentiments of every individual who had the courage to comment. This is a social thing, a communal thing, an economic thing, a hope thing, a black thing and a white thing, this is a parent involvement thing as well as Psychological.</p>
<p>Any child that has the sense and the know how to hustle money, get hoes(excuse the expression), rent an apartment, and then be intelligent enough to know and admit a problem is not a child who belongs in a correctional facility. Because we all know that those facilities do not correct anything, they only make matters worse.</p>
<p>I am going to step out on a limb and say &#8220;Be like Sister Sasha&#8221; give up some of your time to our youth. I always hear the elders say, &#8220;it takes a village.&#8221; But the villagers are not responding. WE the people are responsible for this. The government told you to get DTV or else and WE did. Instead of being courageous and defiantly saying no. lets just turn the damn thing off. The government poisons OUR neighborhoods with fast food chains and half empty grocery stores. Instead of standing up against the toxins, we feed it to our children and ourselves on a daily basis. Not once have I heard of a community demanding a well stocked clean and healthy grocer for their neighborhood. Instead of monitoring the activities of our children, we buy them cell phones, and two ways, pagers, and the internet. </p>
<p>When will it stop? and When will we come together as a community STAND, TAKE ACTION, and SAY NO MORE? WE ARE TAKING BACK OUR CHILDREN, OUR SCHOOLS, OUR PRIDE, OUR TRADITION, OUR LEGACY. DON&#8217;T CROSS THESE TRACKS UNLESS YOU ARE BRINGING SOMETHING POSITIVE; BECUASE IF YOU ARE NOT STAY THE HELL AWAY.</p>
<p>PeaZe</p>
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		<title>By: kim h20s</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11449</link>
		<dc:creator>kim h20s</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Feb 2009 14:48:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11449</guid>
		<description>my heart breaks for these girls.  i hope and pray that they find a mentor who is a strong business woman who can help them channel their obvious innate business acumen in the right direction.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>my heart breaks for these girls.  i hope and pray that they find a mentor who is a strong business woman who can help them channel their obvious innate business acumen in the right direction.</p>
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		<title>By: Anna</title>
		<link>http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/2009/02/26/how-do-we-handle-our-daughters/comment-page-1#comment-11434</link>
		<dc:creator>Anna</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 27 Feb 2009 01:56:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://blackandmarriedwithkids.com/?p=3495#comment-11434</guid>
		<description>You can give your kids all the love and all the attention that you think you can.  The problem is that some parents don&#039;t worry or wonder where their kids are.  I also believe that jail is not the answer. If a kid steals and gets charged as an adult and we put them in a jail with adult prisoners they only get introuduced to more &quot;dirt&quot;.  Some kids only know what was taught or done to them and we need to reprogram them with counsleing and teaching more self esteem.
~~~~~~~~~
Sasha your comment made my stomach churn.  Kids 8-9 with STD&#039;s, moms wanting kids with the latest fashion and fake nails for a little girl and can&#039;t keep the household utilites on.  The little girl who wrote the essay and read it aloud not knowing what is going on in her houshold is not normal.  SAD!  All kids will want and seek for something.  Keep them busy and on speed dial, even if they are dropped off at church for choir practice it is still my job and right to check on my child.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You can give your kids all the love and all the attention that you think you can.  The problem is that some parents don&#8217;t worry or wonder where their kids are.  I also believe that jail is not the answer. If a kid steals and gets charged as an adult and we put them in a jail with adult prisoners they only get introuduced to more &#8220;dirt&#8221;.  Some kids only know what was taught or done to them and we need to reprogram them with counsleing and teaching more self esteem.<br />
~~~~~~~~~<br />
Sasha your comment made my stomach churn.  Kids 8-9 with STD&#8217;s, moms wanting kids with the latest fashion and fake nails for a little girl and can&#8217;t keep the household utilites on.  The little girl who wrote the essay and read it aloud not knowing what is going on in her houshold is not normal.  SAD!  All kids will want and seek for something.  Keep them busy and on speed dial, even if they are dropped off at church for choir practice it is still my job and right to check on my child.</p>
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