Congrats and good luck Jonesi!

I shared with a mutual friend (though him though) that my fiancé wanted to pay for my dress and she made a comment that I was supposed to do that. Now I had no problem with him helping me pay for it as long as he didn’t see it and let her know that. She then said that was gay…..now WTF? I was pretty much done sharing with her for the time being. I felt like ‘just because your husband didn’t help pay for your dress my fiancé is wrong for wanting to pay for mine?’

But anyway….I would just ignore it. I know it’s hard to not share that you’re getting married so I think the best bet is to ignore it or like you said you’ve done, put a stop to those who drone on and on about it. Good luck!!

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That is so true.
@ Jonesi, I hope I did not say anything to make it more overwhelming than planning a wedding is already. I am only going to say, “Don’t stop believing”. I will give you an example. You love your fiance’ and you want to marry him. You know that the two of you care for and are right for each other. You can’t stop the birth of a child because you are too afraid to continue. LOL. Let it happen and let it be. It is what it is and some ppl get jealous that it is not happening for/to them. Keep up the Wedding Post because you know I do enjoy them. Nobody will ever be able to please all.

What I experienced was that those fantastic once-in-a-lifetime moments (weddings, pregnancy, etc.) are almost invitations for opinions/comments. I can even say that whenever someone mentions planning a wedding I want to know all their details and offer things that I learned during my planning that I think will be helpful to them.

And I do remember that the closer it got to the day the less patient I was with peoples opinions and advice, whereas at the beginging I was anxious to hear all options and ideas. Now because of that experience I try to wait until someone asks my opinion before I hit them with the tsunami of advice.

Sift through all the advice because some of it will be good. Continue to be patient, blank stare and all or you can say something like “I’m sure that will be/was great for your wedding but thats not what I want for mine” because most of the time people are well-intentioned but clueless.

P.s. I LOVED alfred angelo and ended up getting my bridesmaids gowns from there as well.

Jonesi – Ahh, I remember these days and I’m so glad they’re gone. When my wife and I decided to get married in Barbados, the country of her side of the family’s origin, everyone here threw a fit and shared with us how the money could be better spent and how it would prevent most of the folks (who weren’t even in communication with my wife) from attending. Funny thing about it is that people felt they could talk to me to get to her, not knowing I was the driving force behind the destination wedding. We even received a letter from one of her cousins imploring us not to because then she wouldn’t be able to bring all of her children (and she’s got a lot). It was ridiculous.

But we did what we wanted, apologized to those (her grandmothers) who couldn’t fly and the whole thing turned out great.

Basically, do what you want to do. It’s all about you and your man anyway even though no one realizes this going in.

E. Paynes last blog post..On the Couch

But this wasn’t an isolated incident, it happens more often than people sharing something positive. With all that said, I was hoping to get people to realize how their comments, solicited or not, especially pertaining to something as beautiful as a wedding ceremony, really do have an effect. In the beginning I really would take things to heart and start second guessing some of my decisions – but my mother helped me quickly realize this isn’t about anyone else or what they think; And quite frankly this day really has no lasting merit over my future marriage – it’s just a celebration! I have been very intentional about not getting caught up in the hype, while I am excited, because making sure I go into this knowing I am making a commitment to my God and fiancé is the real prize to me

It’s the God in me…if it was just me, I’d be the subject of your aggravation, TRUST ME. LOL

God bless!

But as far as your question is concerned, here’s what I would say: know who your inner circle is. Those are the people who love you unconditionally and would never purposely say or do anything to hurt you or aggravate you. This doesn’t necessarily mean they are “yes men” that will agree with everything you have to say, but that their love for you drives their interaction with you. Obviously at the top of the list for you (I think…based on your past comments) is Jesus. Then your fiance, and whoever else you want to add.

Then purpose in your mind that what everyone else says is irrelevant. Thank them for their opinion, be polite, but keep it moving. If it don’t apply, let it fly. LOL