Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.
I have slept with my baby since she was born. She is my first (maybe only) and I had to have her near me for when she needed to nurse. Plus, SIDS scared the living day lights out of me and I needed to do a breath check every so often during the night.
She is weaned now, 11 months old, and still sleeps with mommy and daddy from time to time (try 3 or 4 nights a week...lol). Also, she slept on her stomach almost from birth. She only had to spit up once in her sleep while laying on her back for me to change how she slept. And even though my back hurt from sleeping on my side and I had neck spasms; I wouldn't have it any other way.
As long as you evaluate you and your baby's sleeping patterns thoroughly, then you can make a more educated decision.
If you or your spouse sleeps like a log, then I would not suggest you sleep with your baby in the bed.
Log sleeper...that would be me before I had a baby.
Light sleeper...that would be me after my son decided he wanted to leave his bedroom and climb in the bed with my husband and I 3 nights out of the week. LOL
Great commentary, ewok!
We slept with our son for over a year while I nursed. He fed every 90 minutes for the 1st 6 months and every couple of hours after that. I couldn't imagine having to get up out of the bed every time he was hungry. I understand why experts are warning parents against co-sleeping, some people are sound sleepers and for them it may not be a good idea. For the majority of parents, especially nursing mothers I think it's fine. I have only one caution, once you start it's hard to get them OUT of the bed as they get older.
All four of my kids slept with me. Now I don't think I am ever really asleep.. I think I am just resting with my eyes closed. The smallest sound wakes me up. Our youngest is 12 months old now. And we just started to put her in her crib about a month ago.
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Thanks Harriet!
Ahhh yes. Sleeping like a log. The last time I did that was the day I went into labor. Ha!
And Shawna, I know it will be very hard to get my little one out of the bed because I remember how comfy my own mother's bed was and still is!
We will never sleep right again, I am thinking....
I would like to say I am guilty of this but it's guilt to me if you don't. It's a natural instint expecially for a nursing mother. You can have a bassnet next to your bed but after having a baby it's not easy to keep getting the baby out every hour or so. My suggestion is that after you get well, durning the day put the baby in their own sleeping quarters so it's not so hard to wein them from your bed. I was one to also sleep with my babies on my chest. I did it because SIDS has been reseached that a baby forgets to breath. As far as light sleeping get use to it, it turns into being a champion of mastering the art of sleeping with one eye open as they get older and so far for me that has not diminished.
I don't have children but I have memories of sleeping with my mom to the point where we played hide and seek in the middle of the night! Lmao...she tried her best to get away from me in the middle of the night but if I woke up and she was no longer there, I couldn't sleep until I found her! My 7yr old sister is kinda the same way now, but not as extreme because she has my 14 year old sister to sleep with. It's a comfort issue and because I remember how good it felt to sleep with my mom, I plan to sleep with my babies too...atleast until the hubby puts an end to it :-)
But I'm confident it's a maternal issue. When my godson was first born I would nap beside him as he slept (I watched him daily when he was first born) and the littlest movement would awake me...
My son was 7 weeks premature, so I was afraid to let him sleep with us. Plus my husband sleeps like a wild man and he doesn't even awake when our son cries. I kept him close to my bed in a bassinet for the 1st 5 months, he sleeps in a crib in his own room. He is 6 1/2 months now. I let him take naps with me since he was a newborn, but only if it is just me and him.
Sigh, ok, I breastfeed, so many nights I have fallen asleep on my baby while she was laying next to me. After this happened a few times, we got a co-sleeper.
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