Meet Me In The Middle
By Tara Pringle Jefferson
Everyone always says, “Opposites attract,” but they never tell you what to do when you’re in love with someone who could not be more different from you.
For example, look at me and my husband. I’m pretty much the Energizer Bunny. Always on the go. Always. My husband complains that he can’t help me with the housework because I flit around the house so much he’s not even sure what I’m doing or where I’m going next.
My husband, on the other hand, moves so slow it should be illegal. I have “Walk Rage” when I’m with him. “Mooooove it!” I say as I power walk past him. His energy mode Is permanently set to “chillax.” It never varies.
The first year of our relationship was tough because I found that the very thing that attracted me to him (he’s so cool under pressure) was the same thing making me want to strangle him on a daily basis. And vice versa. My penchant for “get it done NOW” was driving him up a wall, even though initially he loved me for being so ambitious.
So how did we fix it and how can you do the same? Simple:
1. Remind yourself what you love about the other person. I always go back to my husband’s reaction to our unplanned pregnancy. Super cool, never broke a sweat. It’s the times when things are the most stressful when his laid-back nature really makes me swoon.
2. Turn the focus on yourself. If your significant other is getting on your nerves, ask yourself: What’s really the problem here? Is it me? Whenever my husband annoyed me by taking a painfully long time to make a decision, I had to remind myself that it was bringing out my number one character flay: impatience. By working with him, I made myself a better person. (Although I’m still impatient!)
3. Realize you won’t change them. They are who they are and they will only change if they want to. Period. Men or women – we can be very stubborn and set in our ways. The only way to work around it is to recognize how the other one operates and act accordingly. For example, if I need my husband to take the trash out, I need to be prepared to wait until he is ready because in no way, shape or form is he hopping up immediately to do it. No sir.
BMWK family – is your significant other the total opposite from you? How do you make it work?
Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer living in Ohio with her husband and two children. Visit her blog, www.theyoungmommylife.com, to read more of her observations about life, motherhood and love.
Add a comment
Comments (5)