http://singleindependentsistah.wordpress.com/2010/02/19/is-cheating-just-par-for-the-course/
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If a relationship “isn’t working,” the most respectful thing to do is to make attempts to correct the issue or leave. However, it is not always simple. Please do not take this the wrong way, I am not condoning my behavior of having an affair, it was a poor choice. These are not excuses, just my personal experience a few close to me.

A husband who is the sole provider of his family, works 60hrs/week, and has two small children. Loves his wife dearly and acknowledges she is a good mother and good wife. However, she deals with occasional depression, has an illness in which she is in and out of the emergency room, and in constant pain. He wants to be strong for his wife, yet it’s taking a toll on his spirit. He does not seek out to cheat, however expresses his fears, stresses of work, etc to a female friend versus “complaining” to his wife. Not the appropriate outlet but that’s how his affair began.

A husband who is a good father and husband. Yet his wife puts all of her energy into the children. They do not date, she won’t leave the children with a babysitter. The kids sleep in the bed and stay up late. They never have any time alone. He expresses his needs for quality time together. Nothing changes. He has hopes it will soon get better. He loves her and does not want to leave her with the children? A woman shows interest in him, he enters an affair.

Marriage counseling should have been demanded. I should have demanded counseling in my situation. The effects of affairs are far worse.

It’s greed!!! Tiger had a beautiful wife that he pursued, won and proposed to and, that there is something ” missing” from the relationship is a tired, overworked , flimsy, insubstantial excuse. He wants more than one beautiful woman and to be serviced by them. I don’t think cheating is EVER more complicated than a man/ woman wanting more good stuff and thinking they can get away with it.

If a relationship isn’t working or “something is missing” the normal and honest response is to work it out or leave. If a woman feels something is missing she is told that she can’t expect everything from her partner, and to satisfy those needs through other friendships or activities. Honesty is a wonderful thing between two people.

Just for others, there are many positive aspects of having ADHD. I am very creative and talented. I can amazingly multitask at times. My friends never get bored with me as I am outgoing and enthusiastic. Rarely tired and my children never experience a dull moment with me. For these, I choose not to take my medication daily.

I admire your candor. That takes a lot of character.

Glad to see your husband is stepping it up.

I have a site that provides a bit more information about adult ADHD, EntrepreneurswithADHD.com or EswithADHD.com. Also, I recommend a book called the DaVinci Method by Garrett Loporto. Like most things, when it comes to ADHD knowledge is the key.

You can have both — ADHD and a Happy Marriage.

Good Luck!

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD(scored high on two assessments). Concentrating is difficult for me, I get bored easily, I changed jobs 5 times in a period of 5 years but maintained my last for 6 years, it was not odd for me to cheat while dating prior to marriage, I love fun and excitement, and a monotonous schedule drives me nuts. Because of these traits, I asked my doctor if that may have contributed to my history of cheating and recent affair but he denies it. My fear prior to marriage was that I would get “tired” of my spouse. As long as there was fun and excitement, I was fine. But increasing responsibilities made life difficult, I struggled to manage my home, my children, and my job, forgetting family birthdays, and always late. I was stressed and all over the place, the affair allowed an escape for me. Fun, passionate sex, and more without the responsibilities.

My husband found out that I was having an affair but is not aware that we were also physical. The “wake up” call now has me as his top priority and there are more efforts being made to meet my emotional needs. It is a work in progress and I am really having a difficult time to reconnect with my spouse.

Thanks for the article, I will be looking forward to articles relating to ADHD. I recently started medication and things are much better.

Look there were obvious psychological needs that Tiger Woods displayed from the beginning.

I mean I could not believe that his father would allow him to diminish the black influence in his life, that whole golden kid non sense.

I understand that he has siblings but I have never seen them around him.Remember when Tiger started fighting with his caddy over fees and the fact the caddy was stealing advertising? Sure maybe they had a point, but the way that they started personalising it which made them look cheap.

Black people have been used to Tiger Woods being unfaithful, so the wife has just woken up to the realitity. There is a Jazz standard called “What is New”.

Tiger needs to sit down and think, why am I so scared to be identified with black people? I mean the man actually compared black culture with a little Island and said he preferred that. That is a talk of the ignorant, not worthy of soemone who even entered Stanford.

I am sorry to see that boy so unhapppy but look at him when he place golf and how throws clubs around the golf course.
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