10 Things I’m Gonna Do Once My Kids Move Out My House

First, let me add this disclaimer: I love my kids. I really do. They are the reason I get out of bed every morning, they are the reason my heart beats, they are the reason I breathe. Okay, got it? I love ‘em. Don’t question it.

That said, there are days when they are running around, screaming, pushing, making messes, that I go to my “happy place” and daydream about the glorious times ahead I’m going to have in 2026, when my youngest hits 18. I’ll be 40 and ready for the new phase in my life.

Yeah, I’ll miss the cuddles, the cute little outfits, the giggling for no reason, the wonder in their eyes when they learn something new, the ability to balance both of them on my hip. I’ll even miss the car seats and strollers and sippy cups, all the baby/kid crap I’ve shelled out thousands for over the past three years. (Although I will NOT miss the daycare bills – at all.)

I’ve given it some thought and here are my 10 things I’m planning to do once I have an empty nest:

1. Get me a tiny car. One that holds like one and a half people. Like one of those Smart cars. Better yet, I’ll just ride my bike everywhere. Kids need me to help them move – I’ll just rent a van.

2. Make nothing but my favorite meals. My husband hates tomatoes. My daughter doesn’t really like meat. My son hates green beans and broccoli. Whenever I’m cooking – which happens to be one of my favorite things to do – I’m always making substitutions and trying to remember who eats what, who’s allergic to what, and how someone likes it prepared. When the kiddos move out, it’s all Tara, all the time. (Yes, my husband will still be there, but he’s pretty laidback as long as food is hot and on the table when he’s hungry.)

3. Take two annual week long vacations. Even if I gotta spend them at home. Without having to worry about babysitters, I figure this should be easier to do.

4. SLEEP!!! I plan on becoming a Master of sleep when my kids hit their teens, but when they move out? Oooh, wee, I’m gonna get my Ph.D in unconscious living!

5. Get some beautiful, non-kid-friendly furnishings. In my house now? Multicolored carpet, stain-resistant couches, several different tablecloths we have to rotate almost daily once they get stained, a broom in every corner, slipcovers on the major furniture. I want my house to look pretty and put together, not like the dwelling of a couple who is trying to ward off complete and utter destruction by two knee-highs.

6. Find me a baby to snuggle whenever I get that “Aww, I miss the baby stage!” feeling. Hopefully my sisters will have popped out a kid or two around this time, so I can get that feeling out my system and have my uterus all to myself at the end of the day. My reproductive system is on LOCKDOWN.

7. Re-rekindle my relationship with my husband. We already started having weekly date nights and our intimacy is on point right now. We’re working it out, even with two little ones clamouring for most of our time and attention during the week. But once the kids get older, I look forward to our relationship deepening and maturing even more. We’ll be at 20+ years of marriage and both will be in our early 40s. What does that mean? I don’t know but I’m excited to find out.

8. Admire our handiwork. With any luck, our kids will be intelligent, kind, self-sufficient people by the time they leave our house. That will come after years of in-your-face parenting, correcting little mistakes and pointing out the lessons in the big mistakes. I’d like to think my husband and I can give each other a big high five and say “Great job! We rock!”

9.Shh. You hear that? It’s called “quiet.” And I’m gonna enjoy every second of it.

10. Cry. Yup, I’ll probably be a wreck when they leave. It will take me a little bit of time to figure out how to adjust, but I’ll be real. I know I’m gonna miss my babies. Even if they’re not babies anymore.

BMWK family, what are some of the things you are going to do\did once the kids move out?

Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer living in Ohio with her husband and two children. Visit her blog, www.theyoungmommylife.com, to read more of her observations about life, motherhood and love.

About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

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