Money Monday: Mama Knows Best – The Childhood Money Advice We Should Be Listening to as Adults

by Dr. Charles Alonzo Peters

It never ceases to amaze me. Despite how grown up you think you are, you’ll never be as smart or as wise as your parents.

As an adult, I’m only now beginning to fully appreciate the lessons they tried to teach me. The phrases and sayings that made me roll my eyes with frustration are now springing to life with new meaning (OK, so I didn’t physically roll my eyes, I did have Black parents, but you get the point).

Here are a few of them. They’re things I hated hearing as a kid, but now have made me better off financially. Maybe you can relate or perhaps you have a few of your own to ad.

“No you don’t need any more toys, you don’t even play with the ones you have”

Like any kid I was magically drawn to the toy aisle. I’d imagine what I’d do with the new GI Joe action figure or the shiny metallic Matchbox car.  When I turned to my mom she’d ask me why I needed another – my room was full of toys as it was.

To be fair she had a point. What kid doesn’t have toys not only in their room, but also spread throughout the house in every nook and cranny known to man?

As an adult, I’m only now starting to take my parents’ advice to heart. How many times have I bought a new book, knowing I had a shelf full of books at home I hadn’t even touched?

Ladies, how many of you purchase a sharp pair of shoes or a new outfit even though the inside of your closet looks like a Macy’s department store? Men, how many of us buy new DVDs or video games knowing we have ones still stacked in the living room unused? Worse yet, how many of us spent money for that super, deluxe 400 channel cable service when we barely have time to watch programs on basic cable?

Yes, I think my mama was on to something.

“No you don’t need it, you WANT it”

No one could clarify the difference between a need and a want faster than my mother.  School clothes and my new glasses were needs. Baseball cards, movie tickets, and ice cream were wants.  I wasn’t totally deprived as a child. We did get  want items but only after all the needs were taken care of first.

It’s funny as adults we forget to break things down into needs and wants. We’ll happily splurge on wants like televisions, ipods, and clothes but then scramble to make the rent.

Worse yet, we’ll even rationalize a want into a need. I know I’ve been guilty of that all too often. Of course you “need” the new outfit or shoes. You have to dress the part or people at work won’t take you seriously. Yes you “need” that new foreign sports sedan because your clients have to see that you’re successful.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t see anything wrong with purchasing your want items, but only after you’ve taken care of needs like saving for retirement and paying off credit card debt.

Chalk another one up for mom.

“You want to go to McDonald’s -  Boy you know I make better hamburgers at home”

Yes I had one of those mothers who was frugal before frugal was fashionable.  She avoided fast food places like the plague. In her mind they were pure money pits. Besides she knew her food tasted way better than anything grilled up by a bunch of teenagers making minimum wage.

So we’d drive past a Wendy’s or McDonald’s and look with envy at the other kids leaving with their Happy Meals in hand. Yet, looking back, mom’s thick ol’ hamburger stuck between two pieces of wonder bread did taste better than any thing we could have eaten at McDonald’s.

Only as an adult, after years of wasting thousands of dollars eating out, have I realized the value of her wisdom. No I’m no Bobby Flay or Chef Batali but my food is edible and my wallet is thanking me for it.

Yes, our parents delivered advice more precious than any found in a personal finance book.

What are some of the sayings you dreaded as a kid, but that have turned out to be words of wisdom as an adult?

Over the next few weeks you’ll get great weekly insight and tips on managing your greenbacks by Dr. Charles Alonzo Peters of MochaMoney.com so be sure to check back.

About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

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