Guarding Your Friendship With Your Spouse
by Tara Pringle Jefferson
My husband and I are BFFs. When I get good news he’s the first one I call and when I get bad news his shoulder usually gets soaked with my tears.
I love that we’re close. Not just lovers. Not just parents. Not just husband and wife. But FRIENDS.
Sometimes our different ties to each other fluctuate. We’ll be in a phase where being parents seems to consume us. Then we’ll find balance and take the romantic side of our relationship to the next level.
But I’ve noticed when I’m really the happiest – when we’re in “friend” mode. When we just enjoy being in each other’s company. When we’re not stressed about bills or work.
But how do you nurture the “friend” aspect of your relationship when so many other roles fight to be #1?
1. Realize that if the “friend” role remains constant, it’s much easier to fulfill the other roles.
2. Speak pleasantly. How do you talk to your other friends? Do you notice your voice is much calmer and sweeter? Mimic that same tone when speaking to your spouse, even when you’re irritated.
3. Get away as often as you can. Sometimes it’s hard to be friends when the house is a mess or the bills are overdue and falling over from the neat little pile on the counter. Go for a walk around the block or at the park.
4. Tease each other.
5. Tell your kids that Daddy/Mommy is your best friend. Being accountable to your kids helps.
BMWK family, what other tips would you add to this list?
Tara Pringle Jefferson is a freelance writer and blogger living in Ohio with her husband and two children. Visit her blog, www.theyoungmommylife.com, to read more of her observations about life, motherhood and love.
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