Four Lessons Learned From My Parents’ 27-Year Marriage
Yesterday, my parents celebrated their 27th wedding anniversary (only reason I can remember the number is I add “+1″ to my age. LOL). In all the hustle and bustle of my day to day life, I completely forgot. Oops.
But even when I miss the actual date, I will never forget the marriage lessons they’ve passed on to me, whether they knew it or not. I use some of their marital wisdom in my marriage, and I thank them for giving me a solid example of what (not) to do when it comes to keeping a happy home. I could probably go on for days, but here are probably the top four lessons I’ve learned from watching Fred and Marilyn do their thing:
1) Communication is key. So many of my parents’ problems could have been prevented or at least alleviated if they had better communication. My mom has told me this time and time again.
2) Vows are very real. Do whatever you can to stick to them. “For richer”? “For poorer”? Those times are going to come. “In sickness and in health”? There’s a big possibility that one of you will face a major health issue at some point during your marriage. My parents haven’t had any huge health scares (knock on wood), but I can tell they love each other by how much their world stops when the other is sick. They’re already great to each other, but they take it to another level when one is ill. That, to me, is what marriage is about.
3) Variety.is.necessary! My parents have been married for 27 years, but they’ve been together for 34. (Did I mention my parents are barely 50? They got married in their early 20s after “dating” in middle school and dating in high school. My mom turns 50 in two weeks, and my dad turns 52 this year.) It is incredibly hard to do things the other person hasn’t seen before, or do things you haven’t done before. My mom recently requested that my dad stop giving her flowers. (I guess it gets old after a while.) So he bought her an Edible Arrangement bouquet of fruit as a twist on the old idea. She beamed. Same sentiment, different delivery—makes all the difference.
4) Pick the spouse that you need, not necessarily the one that you want. What I mean is, my parents recognized early on that their relationship was something special. I’ve never seen a man (my own husband included) who treats his wife like my dad treats my mom. He does everything for her without complaint. My mother has told me countless times that my dad is like her right arm, that she couldn’t function well without him. They know, deep down inside, that they were made for each other. While someone else might have more money or a better job, no one else would treat them the same.
What marriage lessons have you gleaned from watching your parents in action?
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