What Should I Do If I Hate My In-Laws?

We had a very lively discussion during #MarriageChat last week because the topic was Dealing with the In-laws and Extended family. Having conflicts/problems with the in-laws is very common. Perhaps it’s because your spouse’s family thinks they have his/her best interests at heart, perhaps they see you as an outsider, perhaps they resent the fact that your spouse has a new family and a new priority, or perhaps someone is being just plain ignorant. Whatever the case, we found that there are things that you can do to towards having a healthy, respectful relationship or improving your relationship with your in-laws.

Check out some of the great advice that we received from our #MarriageChat family and our special guests, The Marriage Coaches (Ben and Alicia Walker) via @iluvbeingmarried and @WalkerBenjamin.

Overall, we found that the role of a good in-law is to be supportive, accept your spouse into the family, and don’t interfere in the marriage.

Ok..that was a joke..but true!!!

Another question from @MarriageChat:

Overall, we said: always be respectful, ask your spouse to handle issues with their parents, and to set boundaries with in-laws (letting them know your spouse is now #1.)

Then, @MarriageChat asked:

The Marriage Coaches said (via @iluvbeingmarried and @WalkerBenjamin) communication and consistency is key. Have a discussion amongst yourselves first (husband and wife) about what the boundaries are and then with your family.

Finally @MarriageChat wanted to know:

And we will close out this recap with great advice from The Marriage Coaches.  If you love your spouse, then you will want to have a good relationship  with their parents.  Keep a positive attitude and work together as a team to repair the relationship.

If you missed #MarriageChat, don’t worry as it occurs every week at 9 PM ET.  Also, for more information on how to deal with in-laws, check out this blogtalkradio show with The Marriage Coaches.

BMWK Family – Have you ever had problems with your in-laws? If yes, how did you handle it? Can you provide us with additional tips on having a healthy relationship with your in-laws and extended family?

About the author

Lamar and Ronnie Tyler are the creators of the award-winning blog BlackandMarriedWithKids.com . They also are behind the Amazon.com bestselling DVDs Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me and their latest documentary Men Ain’t Boys that explores manhood in the African American community. The Tylers are also the proud parents of four children.

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