7 Reasons To Attend Couples Counseling

BY: - 21 Feb '12 | Marriage

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by Tiffany Sanders, Ph.D

Couples too often wait until their relationship is on the verge of a break-up or when one partner is “done” before they decide to attend couples counseling. Many couples hesitate to go because they don’t want to be told what to do in their relationship, and often they believe they can fix the problems on their own. However, relationships are hard work and a licensed counselor can help couples weather a storm that is threatening their union. Here are 7 reasons to attend couples counseling to revitalize, save or improve your relationship.

1)  Enhance communication

 Unreliable strategies such as the “silent treatment,” shouting or using disrespectful words can damage a relationship. In couples counseling, discover effective, healthy communication strategies to ensure that both of your wants, needs and frustrations are heard in a respectful manner, while learning how to create a relationship that encourages sharing, talking and connecting.

2) Increase intimacy  

Ignoring you partners pleas for intimacy and/or sex can lead to a lack of connectedness, foster feelings of insecurity and rejections, and increase the likelihood of infidelity. Couples counseling can not only help you discover your partner’s language of love, but it can also provide you with tips and strategies to keep the spice in the relationship.

3) Work through infidelity

Relationships can recover and be saved when rocked by infidelity. In couples counseling, learn what factors contributed to infidelity, safeguard your relationship from future occurrences of infidelity, and learn ways to forgive, trust and to be trusted.

4) Let go of the past

Baggage from past issues of abandonment, trust or lack of follow through can fracture a relationship, and your partner may be unaware you are still stewing over those issues from the past! In couples counseling learn to become unstuck, find ways to move on, forgive and focus on your happiness and the future.

5) When you think you might be happier with someone else

If you have been with your partner for many years, things can become boring. Attention from a past lover or coworker has you wondering if you could be happier with someone else. However, the grass is not always greener on the other side. In couples counseling learn how to reconnect with your partner and regain the excitement to create a lasting relationship.


6) Disagreements in raising children
If you have been with your partner for many years, things can become boring. Attention from a past lover or coworker has you wondering if you could be happier with someone else. However, the grass is not always greener on the other side. In couples counseling learn how to reconnect with your partner and regain the excitement to create a lasting relationship.

 

The way you parent, discipline, and nurture your children anger or frustrate your partner. Couples counseling can help you agree upon effective strategies to raise your children and reduce inconsistencies in parenting which can breed children who misbehave.

7) Money management

He loves new gadgets and electronics, recklessly spends money, and pays the bills late while you are frugal, saving money for a rainy day, purchase of a home and retirement. Working with a counselor can get at the root of the financial problem or reckless spending, and outline financial goals for the family to save and to enjoy the pleasures of life.

Have you ever been to couples counseling? What was your experience?  

Tiffany D. Sanders, PhD, is a relationship expert, licensed psychologist, owner of Sanders & Associates, a group counseling practice based in Naperville, IL, and author of the book My Purpose is For Real: 7 Simple Steps to Get Back on Track to Achieve Your Dreams

 

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9 WordPress comments on “7 Reasons To Attend Couples Counseling

    1. Rstan22

      Marriage counseling can be helpful.   I have also had some marriage counseling that was totally one sided. It’s a delicate balance.  Teamwork makes the dream work and a great coach can make all the difference in the world.  Pray for guidance for who is best to guide you.

      Reply
  1. Darken2006

    I agree that many people wait too long to seek counsel. I am one of them. My spouse wasn’t interested in seeking advisement, so I tried everything in my power I could think of. Unfortunatly it wasn’t enough to keep us together. I feel deep down inside if we had given it a chance we would be in a much better place. I dont know how others who say they salvage a relationship solo accomplish that because in my relationship I prayed, did surveys, queationaires, became quiet, talked, wrote letters, and I now see that it was way too big for me to handle alone.

    Reply
  2. @thelovejourney7

    We went through a great pre-marital counseling that helped us to work together to build a solid foundation for marriage.   I think it was the best thing we could have done. It really helps to have an objective 3rd party and someone who wants to help your relationships grow.   Desiree http://www.thelovejourney.com

    Reply
  3. Reid Davis

    Finding a good counselor is like finding a good mechanic. You have to ask around a bit, and pay attention to what people say about him or her. The profession has both stars and bad eggs, so you have to do your homework if you want a good outcome.

    Reply
  4. counselling in melbourne

    The reasons included in this post are quite convincing and true. These are few reasons which can affect a healthy relation and make it broken. I want to pay my sincere regards to author for this research.
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    Reply
  5. laketarenal

    marriage counseling can be very helpful when both parties “listen intentively”. you have to be open to really hearing the concerns of your spouse and not merely be there to try to have a mediator tell them what they need to work on. this is also a good way to “check in” with one another when issues come up before they become too serious so you don’t want to wait until one of the parties is talking or has filed for divorce to get the help you need. issues like money management and infidelity are two big issues that marriages end over and counseling can help both parties to remember what they promised in their vows and what made them fall in love with each other in the first place. remembering the grass isn’t always greener is a very good point. don’t be so quick to write your spouse off because if your motives aren’t right to begin with you will end up repeating the same mistakes.

    Reply
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