Does Your Role As A Parent Ever Scare You?

BY: - 9 Feb '12 | Parenting

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Occasionally, when I sit with my youngest daughter and assist with homework my mind begins to race. I think about her future and all the possibilities. I fast forward to her finishing elementary school, going to high school and then heading off to college. My oldest daughter is only a few short years away from graduating high school and leaving home. And simply put, it freaks me out. Although scary at times, the whole process has been amazing””from the pregnancy experience through the toddler years right up to where they are now. It just blows my mind. First, I am grateful to God for allowing me to be a parent and also for providing me with the tools and support I need to be successful in this massive role.

I will not take this life-long mission for granted. Sometimes the huge responsibility that comes along with parenthood is unbelievable. As parents we are responsible for shaping and molding the futures of these little people. Every decision we make right now will either result in our children thanking us or their using it to blame us for how they turned out. In the power of our tongues we can speak life to them or eat away at their confidence. We can use each precious moment to encourage and teach them. We can also show them what a healthy parent/child relationship feels like by our actions.

Parenting doesn’t come with a manual. This is exactly why it is so frightening. It makes us constantly wonder if we are doing this right. We learn as we go, use what we were taught and listen to our elders. In the end those parenting choices fall on our shoulders. We are responsible for how our children show up in the world. The level of respect they give to others and themselves, how they clean their homes and build relationships will all be values gained from our words and our actions. Huge, right?

Even how we choose to discipline causes an occasional anxiety. When we have to practice tough love in order for our children to receive the lesson we are teaching. We have to tell them no, when our hearts want to say yes. Everything we do is for their good.

Yes, parenting is scary. It freaks me out to think two people have that much responsibility over other little people. While I do have those days when I may ask “God, are you sure about me for this job,” I know that I was chosen for this role for a purpose. I recognize that I have already been blessed with everything I need. I am further convinced as I watch the young ladies my daughters are becoming that this role was made just for me.

BMWK, does your role as a parent ever scare you?

About the author

Tiya Cunningham-Sumter wrote 360 articles on this blog.

Tiya Cunningham-Sumter is a Certified Life & Relationship Coach, founder of Life Editing and a Career Coach/Trainer. She helps couples and individuals rewrite their life to reflect their dreams. Tiya has been featured in Ebony Magazine, Essence.com and on the Michael Baisden Show. She resides in Chicago with her husband and two children. For more of Tiya's fearless life and love wisdom, visit her blog at www.theboldersister.com

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7 WordPress comments on “Does Your Role As A Parent Ever Scare You?

  1. Cheryl

    Every day! My daughters are   young – a toddler and a 1st grader. I watch how they mimic me with such stunning accuracy – down to the deep thought hair flip when I read – and I am reminded of just how awesome a responsibility it is to parent. I am especially prayerful when I discipline, because I remember all too well the methods my mother used that hurt me.

    Reply
  2. Staycee2

    SCARES the heck out of me.   I have a 14 year old daughter is taking me through the motions, being lazy in school and picking & choosing what homework to do.   HELLO YOUNG LADY THIS IS YOUR 8TH GRADE YEAR OF SCHOOL!!!!   I am ssssssssoooooo frustrated, but I refuse to give up on her, she is my 1st born & only daughter.   PLEASE PRAY FOR ME, my heart is so heavy these days….

    Reply
    1. Tiya

      Ooh Staycee you are not alone. I will pray for you. I also have a 14 year old, so I can relate. I pray over her, give her the tools she needs and just give her (a little space) to find herself. But it isn’t easy. These teen years are something else. Stay strong, you will make it through.

      Reply
  3. Ebony

    I know exactly what you mean Cheryl. I have 2 boys a preschooler and a toddler and even at those tender ages I often question whether I’m doing what I should and how I can do it better. However everyday is a learning experience Ive learned that prayer and meditation is the best source of guidance for me. It opens my heart, widens my patience range and allows me to evaluate everything from a higher perspective aside from that all I can do is trust in god and love them to my greatest ability. Feel free to visit my blog on similar topics http://realnubians.com/?page_id=35

    Reply
  4. Billy Cook

    This is a very timely (well written)  article and discussion. Being a parent today is very tough considering  just a few aspects of our society.  First, I would say is the free flow of “information” that influences us all. This can be especially impactful on our children adn their young minds. Our children are exposed to a whole lot more than we and our foreparents were exposed to and not all of this exposure is good of course. It is almost impossible to shield them from all of this but we have to be ready to shield, filter and educate our children  in the face of  this information and influence  from our society. Another consideration is the state of affairs in our educational system. Less and less resources are being designated for our schools. So as  parents we have to be the “life long teachers, counselors and advocates” for  our children.But finally, the spiritual health of our children is under attack. So to quickly address that as I heard one preacher say, “some of the problem in our schools and society is not that prayer and the  Bible  were taken out there but that prayer and the Bible has been taken out of our homes (ouch!).” So it is difficult, we just have to do the best we can, remain  steadfast and vigilant  and ask God to do the rest.

    Billy Cook

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  5. Gradschoolandbabydrool

    There are times when I think, “I cannot believe this sweet little baby is my kid!!!” Somehow, God saw it fit to make me a mom…which I think is pretty cool. I just pray that I can be half the mother my mom was to me.  

    Sometimes it can be overwhelming being a parent…I have a two year old and she keeps her father and I very busy. We take everything in stride. We accept her for who she is and we understand that two year olds are generally crazy little people with big opinions (and they’re bossy)!  

    At times I doubt my parenting skills. Other times I feel like I am doing a pretty good job.

    Reply
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