The Marriage Diet
At the beginning of each New Year one of my major goals is centered on being healthy. I usually plan to change my diet, workout when I can and basically get in better shape. The reason for that goal is of course to look my best, but also to live longer. With certain illnesses associated with poor eating habits I have to take better care of myself in order to reduce the risk of my falling into one of those categories. However, it does becoming challenging to stick to the health plans I set because life gets in the way and all the other excuses I tend to come up with. It is a must that I take action if I am at all serious about this goal.
For people in general, creating goals is the easy part, sticking to them becomes the challenge. I find that showing up better in our marriages is another major goal that many couples set. Couples are usually looking to change a few of those habits that aren’t quite working or seem to be heavily weighing the relationship down. The desire is also to have a healthier marriage, one in which both partners are successfully contributing. Ultimately couples are trying to avoid falling victim to the marriage illnesses we hear about, like infidelity and divorce.
For all of those who have claimed this year is the year we take better care of our marriages, please consider the following.
The Marriage Diet
The first step to any new health plan is eating right. If our bodies need the right amount of vegetables and protein and less junk, so does a healthy marriage. Eliminating the amount of junk we contribute to our relationship has a huge impact. Things like disrespect, laziness, lack of effective communication and distrust all have to go. Room has to be made for true commitment, sacrifice, honesty and unconditional love.
Eating right alone can be beneficial, but we increase our chances of reaching any health goal with first being realistic about what needs to be lost. At this phase we move from simply talking about it to creating a plan and making it happen. I always tell my children more energy plus more effort equals better results. The same is true in this instance. In trimming the fat, we have to be honest about our own shortcomings as opposed to pointing fingers to those of our spouse. Here, we determine how much we need to lose in order to obtain the desired result. Taking an honest assessment of where we fall short is a great place to begin. We must examine our own communication styles, the energy we contribute and the level of commitment we deliver.
The last and most important step of our marriage diet is to just do it! Yes, I know it is easier said than done. But if we create a realistic plan, we have a better chance of sticking to it. Remember, complete change doesn’t happen overnight. We must start small and take it step by step. As we continue on with the plan we will eventually see those desired results. Jobs and life may get in the way of being successful in this area, but people normally make time for everything else they find important. Aren’t our marriages worth the effort?
BMWK, what will your marriage diet include?
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