A popular quote states that “A father is his daughter’s first love and his son’s first hero.” But what happens when his little girl redirects her love and attention to the cute guy next door or the popular guy in school? Regardless of age, when a daughter finds her first love, it can have an impact on dad.
In a recent CNN article, Shanon Cook discusses the emotional affects on a father when his daughter starts dating. She even describes her own dad’s reaction when she began her first major relationship at 18. He admitted that he felt “threatened” and “powerless” to her new–and older–boyfriend. Another dad went as far as having a house built for his daughter and her boyfriend practically next door when she brought up moving in with him.
Neuropsychiatrist, Dr. Louann Brizendine, expands on the fact that dads not only feel left behind, they fear that they haven’t prepared their child enough or that men will mirror their own acts as young boys. However, Joe Kelly, a father to twins and author of the book, “Dads and Daughters,” emphasizes the importance of trust and realizing that while boys will come and go from his daughters’ lives, he will always be there for them.
“Dad should just realize that this is a really normal part of life for the daughter to be going off on her own…into the young woman stage of life,” Brizendine says.” “And he is going to have to give up part of that special relationship with her. And know that she will come back to him in another five or 10 years as a more grown up young woman.”
Read the complete article from CNN.com
Are you a father who fears or has already experienced a disconnection from your daughter once she started dating? Or, as a daughter, has your father ever shown feelings of rejection when you began finding love?
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