5 Tips for Making Your Long Distance Marriage a Success

BY: - 25 Jan '13 | Marriage

Share this article!

Photo Credit: ToastyKen via Flickr

Photo Credit: ToastyKen via Flickr

By Grace Pamer

Regular, ordinary, plain old marriage can be a big challenge from day to day for the partners involved. Just imagine then what challenges are faced by a married couple who are in a loving relationship who are forced to live apart for long periods of time. There are many reasons why some of us have long distance marriages, from military service to financial obligations, but they all have in common the difficulties of keeping the relationship going. It isn’t easy, as anyone with any experience with it can tell you, but it is possible to make a go of this situation. Here are 5 tips for making your long distance marriage a success.

Prioritize The Marriage

In the daily life of a married couple there are always choices to make. Partners have to establish priorities about how much time they will spend with friends and children, in activities they enjoy with or without their spouse, and with the partner. Sometimes these priorities start going wrong and the relationship suffers because the couple start to take each other for granted. In a long distance relationship, the marriage has to be the top priority – next to the reason it’s that way in the first place.

Make A Schedule

When two people are dealing with deadlines, travel plans and other things that might come up in a long distance relationship, they have to be organized. A schedule must be made and you have to decide you will stick to it, no matter what might happen in the meantime. The schedule is significant because it symbolizes the commitment to each other that continues over the miles. There can be little else as important as being together physically whenever possible.

Make Every Minute Count

When your schedule permits and you are actually in the same physical space, it is vitally important to be together whenever possible. Your time is limited, and if your relationship has been made a priority, and you have stuck to your schedule, then you owe it to each other to commit to romantic, passionate time together, and leave the socializing for other times and places. Make a pledge to yourself and your lover not to waste time that could be spent with each other.

Learn To Use Technology

The long distance marriage that has to not only survive but be successful these days has many more tools and methods to do so, thanks to advances in technology. With the Internet, computers, and smartphones, two people in distant parts of the country, or even the world, can stay in contact by word, voice, and even via live video. Daily interaction with each other no matter where you might be is a must, and with the means available today is easier than ever before.

Learn To Communicate

But the most important tip for having a successful long distance relationship is that you have to learn how to communicate. And I’m not talking about just using words here, but about optimally imparting information, expressing emotion, listening effectively, and being open and honest. When good communication happens in any marriage, the chances for success are much higher, but for a couple trying to make a success of a long distance marriage it is absolutely necessary. One way you can communicate and demonstrate your feelings at the same time is by writing a well thought out love letter — not only will this act as an incredibly romantic gesture, but your partner will appreciate the effort you have put into it.

Marriage can be a challenge under the most ordinary circumstances. The long distance relationship carries many more built-in hazards.

BMWK — Do you have any special ways to make it work successfully?

Grace Pamer is the author of Romance Never Dies, a blog which gives insights into the art of putting together the best marriage proposal ideas and relationship advice. As featured in CanadianLiving.com, FoxNews.com, YourTango.com and many more.

About the author

BMWK Staff wrote 1126 articles on this blog.

Content and articles from the staff and guest contributors of BlackandMarriedWithKids.com

Store

like what you're reading?

Start Shopping!

Discussion

Facebook Wordpress

Former NBA Star Keyon Dooling Fights for His Mental Health and His Marriage

BY: - 25 Jan '13 | Black Celebrity Marriages

Share this article!

Dooling

 

It is always inspiring to read or hear someone’s testimony. Hearing from a couple who was able to face adversity and come out stronger because of it is even more inspiring. It is also encouraging and a reminder to those of us who are struggling in our own relationships that the trials that we dealing with in our lives at this moment are not forever. Although they might feel like the end, they aren’t. Our trials are storms but with love, faith, and commitment they can be weathered and they can become our testimony.

Former NBA star Keyon Dooling had a back-story and it wasn’t until it impacted his emotional and mental well being, landing him in the psychiatric hospital, that he shared it with his wife.

“After blocking out his pain for nearly 25 years, Keyon was ready to come clean. He told his wife he was sexually abused as a child, and that it started when he was just five years old. He had never properly dealt with the shame or the pain from what he endured and was now finally ready to heal. By holding tight to his faith and leaning on Natosha’s support, Keyon sought out the help he needed and fought to save his marriage and keep his beautiful family in tact. In September, he retired from the NBA and spoke out publicly, with Natosha by his side, about surviving child abuse.”

You might read those words and think “there’s no way my marriage would survive that,” but Keyon and Natosha are a testament to the fact that it is possible. To find out how these two are “making it work” visit Essence.

BMWK — Did your spouse ever reveal something difficult about their past? Did you choose to work through it?

About the author

BMWK Staff wrote 1126 articles on this blog.

Content and articles from the staff and guest contributors of BlackandMarriedWithKids.com

Store

like what you're reading?

Start Shopping!

Discussion

Facebook Wordpress