Sometimes Encouraging Yourself is Necessary

BY: - 17 May '13 | Marriage

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The other day as I stood in the kitchen the lyrics to a song began bouncing around in my head.

“Sometimes you have to encourage yourself.”

The past few weeks my mind has been running a mile a minute and I feel like I am constantly playing catch up. During a time in which I have been fortunate to live one of my dreams which has been to work from home while I take care of my youngest (already 8 ½ months), despite being so grateful for the doors that have opened on my behalf, I’m still dreaming up new dreams and making adjustments to some of the old ones.

There are countless days when I call my husband to tell him about an idea I have or a vision I have with regards to my writing. Most often he is supportive, if something matters to me it matters to him, but he doesn’t always share the same level of enthusiasm as I might have. And here’s the part where I admit that I sometimes get upset by that. I fail to remember the fact that my husband isn’t always going to see my vision and rather than getting discouraged that he isn’t jumping up and down over my bright idea I need to take a moment and encourage myself.

In recent weeks, it has been becoming clearer that just because someone isn’t as passionate as you are about a dream you might have, doesn’t mean that they don’t believe in it or you. Rather than becoming upset over the fact that they aren’t responding the way you hoped, look at it as an opportunity to become more versed in the art of self-encouragement. As the song says:

“Sometimes you have to encourage yourself.
Sometimes you have to speak victory during the test.
And no matter how you feel,
speak the word and you will be healed;
speak over yourself,
encourage yourself in the Lord.”

While our spouses are often our biggest supporters and they are the person we look to for encouragement and support, we can’t always expect them to have the same level of excitement as we do when it comes to our dreams. Sometimes it might take a minute for them to catch the vision or sometimes they are able to see things from a different perspective, which might help you re-evaluate things if necessary. Then there is a possibility that they won’t believe. There may be things that excite you that will never excite your spouse in the same capacity. Being that you are two entirely different people you can’t expect the same response.

Encouraging yourself is a good thing. God might speak to your heart and then advise you to be still. While you wait and walk in victory you will have to speak life into whatever has been placed in your heart. You will have to hold on to whatever was placed in you until it is birthed into existence and as you go through the process you might have to be your own cheerleader.

So that is where I am at this moment. I am thankful for the support system that I have in my husband while learning that sometimes I need to speak life into my own situations and claim victory when it comes to the things that I believe God has placed in me even when it is hard to do so.

There will be times when even our biggest cheerleaders aren’t always going to do summersaults. Sometimes they put the pom poms down because they are tired or focused on other things and head for the sidelines to root for us from there.

There will be times when you will have to encourage yourself. It doesn’t mean that your spouse doesn’t love you, or believe in you, it just means that you will need to continue to speak into your own life – something that we ought to be doing anyway. So stand on your dreams and if you are blessed to have a spouse who will stand with you be thankful for that, but know that you don’t have to wait on someone to encourage you. Sometimes you really do have to encourage yourself.

BMWK — Do you agree with the song? Do you find that you sometimes have to encourage yourself?

About the author

Krishann Briscoe wrote 32 articles on this blog.

Krishann Briscoe is a child welfare professional turned freelancer with a background in child and adolescent development and social work. In addition to authoring her personal blog His Mrs. Her Mr., Krishann is a contributor for Disney's Babble, The Conversation and The Conscious Perspective. Krishann resides in Southern California with her husband and their two daughters.


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