BMWK 30 Days of Gratitude Challenge: Week 1

BY: - 3 Nov '14 | Home

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Grateful Challenge 1

It’s so hard to believe that we are in the last two months of 2014! Before you know it, the hustle and bustle of the holidays will be upon us. It’s the time of year that can be so beautiful and blessed for many, but also sad and lonely for others. We all know the saying that “someone always has it worse” than us. But how often do we keep that in mind? How often do we go about cursing people out in our heads for something as simple as cutting us off in traffic, or taking too long in the self-checkout line at the grocery story (guilty as charged)? When is the last time you truly expressed to your spouse just how much you appreciated what they do for you (regardless of how small the action is or if it’s something they do routinely — sometimes we just need to hear the words)?

When you change your mindset to change your habits, you develop a new attitude. And with this 30 day challenge, my hope is that we all develop an attitude of gratitude that comes as second nature. So for the next 30 days (and hopefully beyond), I challenge you to take one action step in focusing on only what you are thankful for. I challenge you to write down how you want to feel and what you want to accomplish at the end of the 30 days.  What are some things you need to let go of or embrace? Who are some people you need to close things out with or situations that need to be addressed? What areas have you been neglecting instead of expressing gratitude?

We’ll be going through a daily challenge and each week will focus on a different area:

Week 1: Self-Gratitude

Week 2: Gratitude for my Spouse/Significant Other

Week 3: Gratitude for my children

Week 4: Gratitude for others

Week One: Daily Gratitude (Self)

Day 1: Meditate. We have to learn to quiet the noise and center ourselves. If you’ve been struggling with a tough decision or other challenge, be still, meditate and pray on it.

Day 2: Write out at least 10 affirmations. Be sure to write in first-person and be sure to keep them somewhere you can easily see them on a daily basis.

Day 3: Relax. Take at least 30 minutes out of your day to unwind and be content doing absolutely nothing. When is the last time you had a mental shutdown?

Day 4: Phone a friend. Meaning…pick up the phone and dial their number – not texting, inboxing them on FB or any other social media platform. But call up a good friend you haven’t spoken to in a while.

Day 5: Read. No, not your Facebook feed but an actual book. Reading really is powerful and a very powerful way to reconnect with, and unlock what lies within you.

Day 6: Exercise. It doesn’t matter what state you’re in. Exercise is a great way to clear your mind and regain some much needed energy.

Day 7: Write yourself a love letter. What do you need to forgive yourself for? What do you need to embrace?

Be sure to check back for the next week’s Gratitude Challenge.

BMWK:   What ways do you actively express or nurture gratitude?

About the author

Christine St. Vil wrote 153 articles on this blog.

Christine St.Vil is co-author of the Whose Shoes Are Your Wearing: 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be. A happy wife to an amazing hubby of 8 years, and homeschooling mother of three, she teaches moms how to FLY (First Love Yourself). She uses her corporate background to work with women who are ready to start a new business, accelerate their career growth & design a life they love. She's on a mission to help moms to battle the mom guilt epidemic, so they can begin to put themselves first on their never-ending list of priorities.


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Do You Know What Your Spouse is Craving?

BY: - 3 Nov '14 | Home

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Who knows your spouse better than you? The quick answer, no one. Having a committed and intimate relationship with someone means we should absolutely know them beneath the surface. Being familiar with your spouse’s likes and dislikes as well as what brings them joy and causes pain should always be on your radar.

The reasons most relationships fail is because either one or both partners chose not to make the other’s needs a priority. It’s so easy to be selfish in a relationship and to do things that benefit our own personal desires. The challenge comes when we sacrifice our wants for those of our spouse. In order to make those sacrifices and supply our partner with what they need, we have to be aware of what those needs include.

All of us crave something. A craving, defined as a great or eager desire or yearning, varies from person to person. While I crave my husband’s attention, support and protection, my husband craves respect, attentiveness and affection from me. It would be difficult to fulfill those requests if we failed to pay attention to one another.

If you have ever wondered what is really required to make a relationship work, it is making sure your spouse isn’t craving anything you aren’t providing.

Yes, love, trust and commitment are key ingredients to be happy in love and all goes without saying. However, there are a few unspoken rules couples forget to adhere to when it comes to their partners. Knowing what your spouse is craving is one of them.

People, in general, are quite resourceful and will surely find ways to ensure their needs are met. This fact is one all couples should consider when it comes to taking great care of the relationship. Our responsibility, as a spouse, is to observe and oblige. Asking ourselves questions to help us better understand our spouse is imperative.

Does my spouse crave attention, physical touch, intimacy, communication, stimulation, home-cooked meals, etc. and am I feeding those cravings? If you find yourself falling short, it’s never too late to step your game up as a spouse. How can we know what our spouse desires and not be willing to give?

Again, meeting our spouse’s needs has to become a priority for every couple. Even when what they’re craving makes no sense to us, we are still expected to fulfill those needs. Remember, when we don’t feed those cravings, we leave our spouse searching for it elsewhere.

BMWK, What does your spouse crave and how are you feeding that craving?

About the author

Tiya Cunningham-Sumter wrote 635 articles on this blog.

Tiya Cunningham-Sumter is a Certified Life & Relationship Coach, founder of Life Editing and Author of A Conversation Piece: 32 Bold Relationship Lessons for Discussing Marriage, Sex and Conflict Available on Amazon . She helps couples and individuals rewrite their life to reflect their dreams. Tiya has been featured in Essence and Ebony Magazines, and named one of the top blogs to read now by Refinery29. She resides in Chicago with her husband and two daughters. To find out more about Tiya, and her coaching, visit and


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