5 Things You Need to Let Go of In Your Marriage This Week

BY: - 15 Jan '15 | Marriage

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Like most little girls, our two girls are especially head over heels in love with Frozen, one more than the other. So it’s no surprise that one of my daugther’s Christmas gifts was a Frozen radio/MP3 player combo. As if she wasn’t already doing it, they can now belt  out the songs of her choosing. If it’s one thing I’m reminded of constantly (even more now that I have to listen to it several dozen times a day), it’s to simply “let it go“.

So it made me ask myself: What are some things that I needed to let go of in marriage?

We can’t always control what happens, but we can always choose to control our reactions to what happens. When things don’t go our way, or when we have a really screwed up day, it’s easy for that cloud to hang over our heads. Or worse, to take our external frustrations out on our spouse. But it’s up to us to choose not to allow our own thoughts to “ruin a good today by thinking about a bad yesterday”. The more you keep repeating to yourself to let it go, the easier it becomes.

So when it comes to marriage, here are 5 things you need to let go of in marriage today:

Ego

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We all have an ego. And if you feel like you don't, then you just might be the one that needs to let it go even more. When it comes to certain situations, we have to be willing to let go of our ego. Sometimes it's hard to be told about ourselves, especially when it comes from those closest to us. Marriage for me has definitely been my own personal development course. I had to accept the fact that my husband has a right to not always agree with me, or to tell me when he's upset about something I did, without me having a fit (or giving him the "oh no you didn't" look).

About the author

Christine St. Vil wrote 153 articles on this blog.

Christine St.Vil is co-author of the Whose Shoes Are Your Wearing: 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be. A happy wife to an amazing hubby of 8 years, and homeschooling mother of three, she teaches moms how to FLY (First Love Yourself). She uses her corporate background to work with women who are ready to start a new business, accelerate their career growth & design a life they love. She's on a mission to help moms to battle the mom guilt epidemic, so they can begin to put themselves first on their never-ending list of priorities.

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3 WordPress comments on “5 Things You Need to Let Go of In Your Marriage This Week

  1. JE

    Excellent points. Number three convicted me for sure. After a big blow up, we both get pretty stubborn and can go a while without speaking. I’m always thinking about how I’m always the one who has to take blame which makes me put off reconciling the situation. But I’m reminded of some smart advice I got from one of the lifers in my church. He said never stop communicating.

    One more thing I’d add to the list is always needing to be right or justified. I feel like justification blocks forgiveness and humility. You may have every right to be all in your feelings, but a little humility goes a long way in my book. I’ll take a woman with humility over a nice body anyday.

  2. Pingback: Moms 'N Charge 5 Things You Need to Let Go of In Your Marriage - Moms 'N Charge

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5 Different Ideas for a Great Date Night

BY: - 15 Jan '15 | Marriage

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As Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, I thought it would be a good time to offer some date night ideas.  Date nights are important to the health of a marriage and a great way to continue to have fun as often as possible with the person you enjoy the most—your spouse.  Planning a date night is also a way to get creative with thinking about different ways to share each other’s company.  One of the things I look forward to the most on the weekends is spending time with my wife. I believe if we consider ways to free up our time (both on the weekends and during the week), we are continuously “working” on building our relationships.

Dancing

I’m not talking about going to the club, popping bottles, yada, yada.  Going to take salsa, merengue, or waltz dance lessons is a fun way to go out and have a great date.  Also, many cities have “dance clubs”, which are groups of people who go to a specific location, as a group on a weekly or monthly basis. They dance the night away with what they have learned in their dance lessons.  Dancing is great exercise and a chance to have a good time and maybe learn a new style with your spouse.

Attending a Live Sporting Event

Whether or not your spouse is into sports, the experience of going to a live sporting event can be a great date night.  High school football and minor league baseball are events that have a family atmosphere and while somewhat relaxed, still have exciting moments and can be a lot of fun, without dealing with large crowds and higher ticket prices.  Professional Sporting Events often can give someone who might not normally be a fan of a sport, the excitement and passion of the crowd when the home team scores a touchdown or a slam dunk.

Couples Night

Several of our most fun dates have been hanging out with other couples.  Sharing experiences over dinner or a glass of wine can be fun and relaxing as we all get to know each other.  Couples nights expands our network of friends and acquaintances and give us an opportunity to build deeper relationships with other couples.

Trying Something New

Everyone hasn’t been to the ice skating rink, so if you haven’t, get with your spouse, find a rink and lace up those skates!  Maybe these are “late afternoon” dates, but horseback riding, paintball and fishing are a few things that you may have never done before, but trying them with your spouse makes for a great time and a great memory—together!

Go to a Comedy Show

I think laughter goes such a long way in relationships.  Experiencing good comedy together is always a way to make our days a little better.  Whether it’s a comedian that has a major concert tour or a small, intimate setting, enjoying comedy together is often memorable and it’s giving each other a reason to laugh-which is always a good thing.

If you put some thought into what your spouse likes to do and what you are up for, then you have a life of great date nights, not only on Valentine’s Day but every date night you share together.

BMWK, what are some other great date nights you have in mind?

About the author

Jay Hurt wrote 85 articles on this blog.

Jay Hurt is a Relationship Coach, columnist and author of the book, The 9 Tenets of a Successful Relationship (http://9tenetsonline.com/about-the-book ). Jay’s focus is working with people who want to design better relationships and get more out of life!

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