How To Keep The Sizzle Before You Fizzle Long After The “I Do’s”

BY: - 27 Aug '15 | Home

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I never used to understand what people used to say when they said things like, “It seems like just yesterday” or “I feel like we just started dating”, after being married for 10, 20, 30 plus years. But now that my husband and I are quickly approaching our ten year anniversary, I get it now.

I get it because I’m saying those same things. I get it because I wonder how I can fall in love with him over and over again after a decade of marriage and almost two decades of being in a relationship?

When I think about how it’s possible, it all boils down to one thing: communication. We haven’t quite gotten to the point of an argument-free marriage, but we are pretty darn close.

Over the years, I’ve learned that words truly do have power.

But even before your words are spoken, they are formed in your thoughts. So if you can control your thoughts, you can control your words which then become your actions and beliefs.

I remember when we got married and I said I couldn’t wait until we could celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary together.

When I think about the relationship I have with my husband, here are some ways that I’ve fallen in love with him long after we’ve said “I do”.

1. Dream together

And dream often. My hubby and I are always talking about what we want to do, and where we want to be whether it’s tomorrow, next month or 5 years from now. It allows us to keep each other accountable to each other.

2. Respect each other enough to walk away

One of the things that I recently relearned is the importance of controlling my words. You’re always in power and in control of what you say, but you can never take back what was said. I’ve realized that it’s so much easier to walk away, than deal with the guilt of saying something that I will later heavliy regret.


3. Talk about the difficult things

Have real conversations and have them often enough that they don’t make you uncomfortable talking about it. I’m the first person to always focus on the good, but I also know that we are not promised anything. So preparation is key for anything.

4. Laugh always

When you’ve been with someone for a long time, you have to find ways to keep things fun and exciting. My husband and I keep each other laughing and we genuinely have so much fun together! Laughter truly is the best medicine.

5. Same team, always

When you begin with the end in mind, you know that no matter what you go through, you will always be on the same side of the fence. When it comes to family, friends, children, remember that you are always one team with your spouse. There’s no trading teammates or quitting.

6. Faith and prayer

When all is said and done, faith and prayer will get you through anything. Even when you may have a difference of opinion, or not sure how you’ll get though something, prayer always changes things.

BMWK: In what ways have you fallen in love over again with your spouse?

About the author

Christine St. Vil wrote 153 articles on this blog.

Christine St.Vil is co-author of the Whose Shoes Are Your Wearing: 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be. A happy wife to an amazing hubby of 8 years, and homeschooling mother of three, she teaches moms how to FLY (First Love Yourself). She uses her corporate background to work with women who are ready to start a new business, accelerate their career growth & design a life they love. She's on a mission to help moms to battle the mom guilt epidemic, so they can begin to put themselves first on their never-ending list of priorities.


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5 Great Men of the Bible Your Husband Should Know

BY: - 31 Aug '15 | Home

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There are many great men in the Bible. We learn about them, study them, and even try to emulate them. We look at the great things they have done and we marvel at their obedience to God. There are awesome accounts of their actions captured in Scripture.

Yes, there are great men in the Bible. However, there are also great men living and breathing today. You may be married to such a man. This is to take nothing away from the great men of old but rather to acknowledge the greatness in the man God has given you.

Your husband has great strengths. Sure, he has weaknesses too, but when viewed in the light of his strengths, you see who he is created to be.

A wife can become so familiar with her man that she fails to recognize the greatness that is within him. Take some time and think about who he really is, then answer the question, “Which mighty man of the Bible does your husband remind you of?”

Becoming an Ephesians 5 husband for your Proverbs 31 wife is not easy. But click here to learn how it can transform your marriage.

The list here is not all inclusive. If your mate reminds you of a Bible personality that isn’t listed, write it in the comments sections.

Abraham – full of faith, a servant of the Lord, a generous giver, a friend of God

Daniel – faithful, wholehearted in his commitments, a man of prayer, dream interpreter

Moses – persistent in the face of adversity, slow of speech, a delegator, a prophet, humble

David – a man after God’s heart, a mighty warrior, a true worshiper, a king, a man with a repentant heart

Paul – a rebel with a cause, not greedy, fearless, great integrity, a coach and trainer to others

There is so much more that could be said about each of these heroes. All had great strengths. Yet, if we shift our focus we could also point out their weakness. When we focus on their strengths we are able to see them in the light of their greatness.

We see them in the light of who God created them to be. It is the same with your husband. He has great strengths. Sure, he has some weaknesses too, but when viewed in the light of his strengths, you see who he is created to be.

So, with your focus on your husband’s strengths; which great man of the Bible does your husband remind you of?

(In no way does this mean to put up with abuse. An area of weakness does not equal abuse.)

About the author

Deborah L. Mills wrote 186 articles on this blog.

Coach, AUTHOR, Speaker, WIFE, Mom, and GRANDMOTHER. That's the gist of who I am. I love people and love to see their life and relationships thrive. As a coach I am ready to support your dream when you don't feel like it. As an author and speaker I am ready to pour into your life so that you can live your best life now. I am a personal and executive coach. Together with my husband I also marriage coach. GO TO MY WEBSITE. THERE IS A FREE GIFT THERE WAITING FOR YOU.


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