5 Things That May Be Killing Your Mood and Your Spouse Didn’t Make the List

BY: - 20 Nov '15 | Lifestyle

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You wake up in a crappy mood and look at the person laying next to you in bed. It’s your spouse. Unfortunately, he is going to have to deal with your funky mood today, the way he has for countless days.

He loves you. He knows you love him. But that funk you’ve been in makes you no fun to be around. As a matter of fact, it makes you downright impossible to be around some days.

You start to get this vibe that you are being tolerated. No one likes to be tolerated. Well, at least, I don’t. I prefer acceptance. We all should, really. Why should any of us feel like someone is doing us a favor by putting up with us?

So feeling like your husband is tolerating you is now ticking you off. What started off as a funky mood is quickly morphing into a nasty mood. You are frustrated, and so is your spouse.

You start to feel like he’s the problem. Surely you can’t be, right? He’s the one that doesn’t “get” how much you do, how tired you are, what you have on your plate, and the list goes on and on. He’s clueless and his cluelessness is frustrating.

You need someone to be angry with, so you decide that you are angry with him. After all, it’s a lot easier to make that choice than it is to dig deep and find out what’s really going on with you.

But here is something to consider. Maybe your husband or wife is not the problem. I’m not excusing anything he may have done that you find frustrating, annoying, or even dismissive. But did he just start acting like that out of nowhere, or did you change? Did something in you shift?

Sometimes we experience a change in our moods, and that change can have a tremendous impact on our marriages. Because we are unaware of what’s going on and why we feel the way we feel, the people we love most often suffer the consequences.

Take some time to think about how you’ve been feeling. Think back to when it started. Now look at the quality of your current relationships. Is your mood having an impact? Are you mad at people you shouldn’t be mad at? Is your spouse taking the fall when this has nothing to do with him or her?

Here are 5 things that may be messing with you mood and you don’t even realize it.

Money Matters

When things are not right financially, the stress can be immeasurable—especially when we are not equipped to deal with the problem at hand. Ignoring financial stress makes things more stressful, and hiding how you feel from your spouse never helps.

Try to come up with a financial plan that helps you both see the light at the end of the “being broke” tunnel, and begin releasing yourself from the stress and mood changes that can come with financial challenges.

Vitamin D Deficiency

Good ol’ vitamin D is seriously far more important than people realize. According to several medical articles and a post in the Huffington Post, signs that you need more vitamin D in your life include weight gain, sadness, bone aches, and more.


Vitamin D is essential and many of us are walking around without enough of it. It’s possible that your change in mood may be a sign that you need more vitamin D in your life. Make that call to your doctor and see if they can help.

Change in Seasons

Oh how I love the holiday season. I even love the snow. You know what I don’t love, though? These short days. I need more sun in my life, and that’s the case for most of us. That’s why so many people develop the winter blues or even Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).

The lack of sunlight (which can also lead to lower levels of vitamin D) and the colder days can lead to serious changes in your mood, and ignoring those changes can lead to trouble. If you don’t feel like yourself and you haven’t in weeks, don’t just ignore it. Seek help.

Dissatisfying Work

There is nothing like having to leave the house in a funk and go to a crappy, stressful job only to return in an even bigger one. The importance of doing work that we find meaningful is something we cannot ignore.

If you are in a pretty bad work situation and you feel incredibly dissatisfied, it will inevitably have an impact on your attitude and behavior when it comes to interacting with your spouse or anyone else you care about.

Even if you must stay in the miserable job for financial reasons, at least start a side hustle doing what you love. Your soul, your mood, and your spouse will thank you for it.

Poor Health Habits

Not exercising and eating crap all day is a surefire way to feel like crap. You have to make your health a priority.

When you don’t, you just can’t feel that great on the inside, and that feeling leaks into other areas of your life. A good mood starts within. Get your health right, get your mind right. Your mood will surely follow.

BMWK family, what are some things that affect your mood and what do you do to make things better?

About the author

Martine Foreman wrote 496 articles on this blog.

Martine Foreman is a speaker, writer, lifestyle consultant, and ACE-certified Health Coach who specializes in helping moms who want more out of life but feel overwhelmed and confused. Through her content and services, Martine is committed to helping women embrace their personal truth, gain clarity, and take action to create healthier, happier lives. For more on Martine's candid views on life and love, visit her at candidbelle.com. To work with her, visit her at martineforeman.com. Martine resides in Maryland with her husband, two kids and sassy cat Pepper.


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