5 Powerful Tips to Help You Stick to Your New Year Goals

BY: - 13 Jan '16 | Lifestyle

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At the start of every new year, many of us decide we’re going to: lose weight, start a business, write a book, quit a bad habit, improve our relationships, etc. The resolutions are endless. And we have the best of intentions.

So why, then, is it that only 8% of us actually achieve our New Year’s resolutions every year? In fact, by January 15th, it’s pretty clear who’s going to be in the 8%. That’s the date where people begin to drop off.

If you’re looking for a tool to help you achieve your New Year resolutions, then the 2016 Whose Shoes Transformational Calendar is the perfect planner for you. The calendar, based on the highly-acclaimed book, “Whose Shoes Are You Wearing? 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be”, features 12 inspiring stories of women and words of wisdom for overcoming major obstacles to live out their purpose.

One of those stories is about none other than Ronnie Harris-Tyler, co-founder of Black and Married With Kids (BMWK). In her feature in the calendar, she’s very candid about what it took for her and her husband, Lamar, to build BMWK into a hugely successful blog and brand with the goal of broadcasting a positive image of marriage and family to the world.

Here are 5 tips to ensure that, like Ronnie, you are part of the 8% of people who reach your goals this year:

Be clear about your “why.”

So many of us jump into setting and trying to achieve goals without a real emotional connection to what it is we want to achieve. If your “why” for wanting to do something isn’t strong enough, your motivation to do it won’t last. Think about what your “why” is and then write it down. Review it daily and use it as fuel whenever your commitment starts waning.

Begin with the end in mind.

It’s always easier to reach a goal when you have a vision for your future. The very first pages of the 2016 Whose Shoes Transformational Calendar/Planner invite you to do just that: write down what you want to have your year look like by the time you reach December 31, 2016. Once you know what you’re working towards, it makes it much easier to plan for it in the present. Don’t underestimate the power of “writing the vision and making it plain.”

BFGG 2016 Whose Shoes Calendar 600x400

Don’t try to eat the whole elephant at once. Have mini-milestones.

The Whose Shoes calendar/planner features monthly goal-setting, and provides a space every month for you to list your top three goals and the actions steps which will help you reach them. Those action steps are critical to setting your goals in motion. Taking clear action steps every month will help you move the needle consistently in the right direction. As they say, “a goal without a plan is a hallucination.”

Celebrate your successes.

They will help keep you motivated to stay on course. In our hyper-connected world which moves at the speed of light, we’re usually so busy chasing success, that we never slow down to pat ourselves on the back for a job well done.

In the Whose Shoes Calendar, you are encouraged to celebrate your successes every month to help you maintain perspective on your progress. That progress will keep you moving in the right direction. At the end of the day, even slow progress is better than no progress.

Write and recite daily affirmations and/or inspiring quotes.

Throughout the planner, there are inspirational quotes to help you get and stay motivated. Motivation is the key to making sure you stay committed to the promise you made yourself that this year would be different.

So many of us wonder why we have a difficult time staying motivated. The reality is that we haven’t developed a motivational strategy. Motivation is a minute-by-minute, day-by-day thing. Motivational speaker Zig Ziglar always said, “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing, that’s why we recommend it daily.” Use daily affirmations and quotes every day to help you stay focused on your goal.

As you embark on another year of goal-setting, achievement and life changes, keep these tips in mind so that when December 31, 2016 arrives, you won’t find yourself in the same place you are today. Make 2016 your year!

You can order your very own 2016 Whose Shoes Transformational Calendar from here while supplies last.

BMWK, What is the best goal setting tip you’ve ever used to help you achieve your New Year resolution(s)?

About the author

Julian B. Kiganda wrote 32 articles on this blog.

Julian B. Kiganda is a dynamic speaker, writer and creative consultant who helps transform and build million-dollar brands for purpose-driven women. She is also co-author of "Whose Shoes Are You Wearing? 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be." You can connect with her on her Bold & Fearless online magazine at www.boldandfearless.me


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Is Jaden Smith a Pioneer of Black Masculinity or It’s Nail in the Coffin?

BY: - 19 Feb '16 | Lifestyle

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If you haven’t heard already, Jaden Smith was recently named as the face of a Louis Vuitton collection for women. A lot of people feel a lot of different ways about it.

Jaden’s never been afraid to push gender and societal norms, famously wearing an all white bat suit to Kim and Kanye’s wedding, and a dress to his prom.

The Internet predictably went nuts. Some went so far as to name Jaden’s most recent milestone as the death of the modern black man. Black men are now getting paid to flaunt feminine garments and sell it to the world as high fashion? This is America today? This is what freedom fighters and civil rights leaders died for? For the marginalized American black male to have the opportunity to further self-marginalize their own image by voluntarily wearing women’s clothing shamelessly in public?


Some have claimed Jaden’s gender fluid style is the great divide between ancient male archetypes and freeing our minds to a more robust definition of modern masculinity. But let’s be real – he’s not the first young man to throw on a dress. So why the commotion now?

Thank You So Much @louisvuitton And @nicolasghesquiere For The Opportunity To Impact This World. |||

A photo posted by Jaden Smith (@christiaingrey) on

Two simple reasons: 1) he’s black, and 2) he’s Will Smith’s famous son.

Now he’s not only famous for being the Fresh Prince’s offspring, Jaden has his own body of work we shouldn’t forget. It’s not like he’s a simple attention-starved child drowning in the shadow of his parent’s celebrity and talent. He’s got albums, apps, albums exclusively on apps, movies, other stuff, more stuff, and even the stuff he hasn’t told us about yet. In short, it’s not like he doesn’t have anything to lose by pushing societal boundaries.

“Just Come Here”

A photo posted by Jaden Smith (@christiaingrey) on

And how many versions of the black male do we find acceptable as a culture? The athlete, the musician, the suit and tie business owner, the entertainer, the laborer, the convict? In spite of every data metric in existence, we even still struggle with the acceptance of a black male as a father.

If we allow ourselves to flourish, black becomes a kaleidoscope of experiences and meanings. Black has never been and can never stand as a monochromatic palette.

We’ve all reminisced with our friends about the good ole days. The days when music was better, lyrics were real, movies were about something, and people cared differently than they do now. And it’s all bullcrap. We have a habit of romanticizing our own era to feel relevant. The past is always just as important as our present, because it all drives us to an inevitable future where the only thing we truly know about it is that it will be different from today.

Change is the only constant.

And whether we like it or not, the further we move away from slavery in our history, the more diverse the blossom of Black becomes in this country. If we allow ourselves to flourish, black becomes a kaleidoscope of experiences and meanings. Black has never been and can never stand as a monochromatic palette.

A photo posted by Jaden Smith (@christiaingrey) on

So it begs the question. After all we’ve been through culturally, politically, and socially. After Jim Crow and facing our criminal justice system, after the government’s war on drugs. After Ferguson, Baltimore, Cleveland, and every other city across across this nation. After Donald Trump.

Is Jaden Smith really the end of black male American culture as we know it?

Are our kids ultimately worse off growing up in a world where Jaden Smith has the chance to thrive?

You might be asking yourself what does a father think when his son so boldly moves against the grain? Well, the BBC asked Mr. Big Willy Style himself recently, and this is how he responded:

“Jaden is 100 percent fearless. He will do anything, you know? So as a parent, it’s scary. It’s really terrifying. But he is completely willing to live and die by his own artistic decisions and he just doesn’t concern himself with what people think.”

Because from my perspective we’ve had much bigger problems for a much longer time that’s had a greater impact on black lives than having the option of shining as who we really are – and not as who we’re expected to be. Sounds like Jaden’s black father would agree. In what world full of free young fearless black minds with the courage to embrace themselves is that a bad thing?

But for the record – you’re not going to catch me rocking any of that stuff. I’m too grown for that nonsense.

BMWK – what are your thoughts?

Photo credit: Feature image sourced from a photo posted by Jaden Smith (@christiaingrey)

About the author

Isom Kuade wrote 70 articles on this blog.

Isom Kuade is a father and a husband, resting his head in the middle of Texas. He's doing his best to adult with purpose and sneak in some good meals along the way. He and his wife tell stories of their triumphs, failures, and biased opinions at pancakesandcider.com.


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