Should Stepparents Post Pictures of Their Stepkids on Social Media?

BY: - 21 Sep '16 | Blended Families

Share this article!

ciaraandrussell

I was surfing through Instagram when I discovered this: a picture of Russell Wilson and his stepson baby Future.

First Day of School for this Champ! #Blessing

A photo posted by Russell Wilson (@dangerusswilson) on

Cute, I immediately thought, the little man is growing up. But then I started scrolling through the post’s comments. And I can’t say I was surprised that some people would hate on the picture (as Internet hate comes with the territory in public platforms), but I was surprised by the perspective of some.

While the majority of the commenters were positive, a few saw the picture of stepdad Russell and baby Future as a direct insult to the biological dad (rapper Future). Some saw the photo as disrespectful, insinuating that the public display of parenting was pitting him (Russell) against the biological dad (Future).

tweets

But that led me to wonder, should stepparents exercise more sensitivity in these areas, especially when it comes to social media? So I asked around. I asked my husband, friends, family, etc., what they thought about the issue. Should there be a protocol for how stepparents interact with their stepfamily online as it pertains to respect for the biological parent?

Well, let’s just say their responses varied.

For the most part, it was the men who thought the photo was distasteful. They saw the first day of school picture as a milestone event, and documenting that event with the stepdad, given the history between the two exes, was a slap in the face. They didn’t see a problem with a stepfather taking part in those moments of a kid’s life, but they didn’t think it was appropriate for the stepfather, especially a new stepfather, to post it to social media (and especially without the mother in the photo).

On the other hand, most of the women were in agreement that posting the photo was totally cool. Russell Wilson and Ciara are married now, so Russell has a legitimate place in baby Future’s life as his stepdad. That means as a loving, parental figure in baby Future’s life, he should be able to share in those hallmark experiences just like the biological parents.

After hearing out both sides, I was still unsure. So I decided to ask a blended family expert. And here’s what I got:

  1. You should encourage every opportunity for the stepparent to bond with the child—and participating in those big moments in a child’s life will have an enduring impact.
  2. Stepparents are a part of their children’s lives, whether the biological parent agrees or not, so stepparents should be encouraged to share in those moments with their stepchildren.
  3. Biological parents should remove their ego from the equation. Are you just mad that someone else stepping up in a parental role to your kids? Or is it an insecurity on your part? Biological parents should be happy (in fact, grateful) that their kids are receiving love from another key figure in that child’s life. You should see nothing wrong with the extra love.
  4. The blended families should be aware of the situations that could cause contention in co-parenting. They should have conversations with the biological parent to discuss boundaries, such as posting pictures of the children to social media. Sometimes, it’s best to avoid an argument or something that could sour the co-parenting relationship.
(NOTE: When it comes to stepfamily issues you are not alone. Our film for stepfamilies, Blended: The Unspoken Truth About Stepfamilies gives a transparent look at the challenges that stepfamilies are facing and shows you how to overcome them. Filled with insight from America's top stepfamily experts you can't miss this. Click here to see the trailer.)

BMWK, do you agree? What’s your stance on stepparents posting pictures of their stepkids on social media?

About the author

Nina Hemphill Reeder wrote 71 articles on this blog.

Nina Reeder is the assistant editor at BMWK. Reeder is a professional journalist, who has contributed for publications and outlets, such as Ebony magazine, AOL.com, Marriott Hotels and more. She has also worked as the senior editor at Upscale magazine, a national lifestyle/entertainment magazine.

Store

like what you're reading?

Start Shopping!

Discussion

Facebook Wordpress

Leave a Reply

Get
Blended Articles Delivered To Your Inbox Daily! Sign up below!

What Every Couple in a Blended Family Should Hear Before It’s Too Late

BY: - 22 Sep '16 | Blended Families

Share this article!

What Every Couple in a Blended Family Should Know

This article is part of a 3-part series to help and support couples in stepfamilies from the pain and hurt that many families face.

We just celebrated 11 years of marriage. And I am happy to say that my marriage is stronger than ever and our blended family is in a really good place.

That’s not something I could have said seven years ago.

Like many couples in a blended family, we were headed for divorce. (Did you know two-thirds of all couples in stepfamilies end in divorce?)

The stress of trying to keep our marriage together while simultaneously trying to get this parenting/stepparenting thing right was too overwhelming.

But the good news is that we turned it around.

CLICK HERE – FREE DOWNLOAD: Blended Family Checklist – 8 Questions Every Stepfamily Couple Should Ask. Don’t give up on your marriage because of stepfamily issues. You can get help and this is the first step plus it’s free! Click here to download your FREE eGuide.

Check out this video below where we share exactly what we did to keep our marriage and blended family together.

The Good News is for Everyone

Having a family that is thriving and not just surviving is not only for a lucky few. Everyone that has a blended family can share in the good news.

 

The Good News is that you can provide your children with a great model for having a healthy relationship and marriage.

Blended300X250

The Good News is that you no longer have to do it alone, you now have the support of your spouse.

The Good News is that your children learn problem-solving skills when they learn to adapt to the new family.

The Good News is that your children now have more loving responsible adults in their lives.

The Good News is that you don’t have to face this alone, there are millions of couples that have faced the same challenges you are facing, and they can show you how they did it.

The Good News is that no matter where you are today, you don’t have to stay there.

If you get the tools you need to address the issues you are facing in your family, you will be able to transform your family from where it is today to where you’ve always wanted it to be.

And that’s exactly what we did to turn things around. We didn’t come into our marriage with the skills we needed to face the unique challenges that blended families face. And they blindsided us and almost took us out…but the good news is that they didn’t!

(NOTE: When it comes to stepfamily issues you are not alone. Our film for stepfamilies, Blended: The Unspoken Truth About Stepfamilies gives a transparent look at the challenges that stepfamilies are facing and shows you how to overcome them. Filled with insight from America's top stepfamily experts you can't miss this. Click here to see the trailer.)

About the author

Ronnie Tyler wrote 502 articles on this blog.

Ronnie Tyler is the co-creator of BlackandMarriedWithKids.com and co-producer of the films Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me, Men Ain't Boys and Still Standing. The proud mom of 4 has been selected by Parenting Magazine as a Must-Read Mom and is one of Babble's Top 100 Mom Bloggers.

Store

like what you're reading?

Start Shopping!

Discussion

Facebook Wordpress