3 Keys to the Perfect Date Weekend Without the Kids! #1 is Vital

BY: - 10 Nov '16 | Reviews

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Weekend travel warriors…. come out and play-eeee-yayyy!!!!

If you’re a regular reader of BMWK then you know that we heavily promote date night and its importance with your spouse.

Date night gives you the opportunity to recharge and reconnect and that connection is vital if you intend to maintain your relationship past the stress of work, parenting and everything else that happens in your world.

But beyond date night there is more!

Whenever we can, Ronnie and I have to take it a level beyond date night and extend date night into an over the weekend mini-vacation.

This can be a weekend alone, a staycation at a local hotel, a quick trip to a neighboring city or exploring somewhere far away that neither of us have ever been.

The excitement and rush of traveling kid-less with each other brings back the excitement and intimacy that we experienced when we first started to date and in our family I’m the one that pulls it all together. I handle everything from flights, rooms and rentals to sightseeing, restaurants and entertainment.

Over the past ten years of marriage, I’ve turned into a highly trained Weekend Escape Artist!  (In fact, I have recently partnered with Homewood Suites and Home2 Suites by Hilton to support their efforts to empower men to become Travel MANagers!)

I know from speaking to couples that many of you are due for an escape yourselves so I wanted to share 3 keys to the perfect date weekend without the kids. The cheapest flights and lowest fairs won’t mean a thing if you don’t get these three things right.

Keep reading to get all of the details:

#1) Know Your Spouse’s Travel Language

One of my favorite marriage books is The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. In the book he talks about learning how your spouse wants to be loved. But, did you know that your spouse has a travel language too?

Does your spouse love to chill on the beach, lay in the hotel bed, sightsee until there’s nothing else to look at or perhaps a combination of all of the above? Knowing how your spouse likes to unwind and relax is vital to planning the perfect weekend escape.

When you know better, you do better…so figure out step one first!

No matter the time of day, our team is here to help provide the excellent service you deserve and are known for.

It’s about time for another weekend escape. So, I am taking my wife to Birmingham, AL to visit historic sites and to relax for the weekend at Homewood Suites by Hilton Birmingham South-Inverness, AL.

#2) Make a Clean Getaway

Early in our marriage, getaways were the worst and always led to arguments. As our marriage matured we realized that it was because of the stress involved with leaving in the first place.

Arranging for someone to watch the kids. Planning what they would eat for the week. Planning what they would wear for the week. Trying to tie up any loose ends with our highly stressful jobs.

By the time we left we were already tired. And being tired, in general, led to being tired of each other lol. We had to learn how to make leaving less stressful so we could make a clean getaway. As we embraced and learned this, it allowed us to start our vacations with a much better tone. That led to less fussing and fighting and more moving and grooving (yeah boy!)

Be sure to take a refreshing dip in the outdoor pool during your stay in Birmingham.

Poolside at Homewood Suites by Hilton Birmingham South-Inverness, AL – My wife’s travel language is relaxation! She loves to relax, to go site-seeing and to go on tours.  She’s going to love the weekend escape I’ve planned to  tour Birmingham, AL.

#3) Be in the Moment

Y’all know it’s hard. You’re talking over a romantic dinner then you feel it — the slow, deliberate vibration of your cell phone letting you know that a message has arrived. Or, maybe it’s a Facebook notification. Or, maybe you just want to check the score of the game or who slapped who during the reality TV reunion special.

The phone is always calling me!

But really, it is your responsibility to be in the moment all weekend long. That means being intentional and engaged every step of the way, even if you’re doing activities that you aren’t crazy about because the weekend is about you both.

The weekend is an escape and our marriages need to escape from technology too! Put the phone up or leave it instead of checking it in the middle of the action.

When we do dinner we’ll agree to put our phones up (except for the occasional food pic) and focus on each other because that’s becoming increasingly harder if you aren’t intentional about making that happen.

These three tips will set you on the path to the perfect date weekend without the kids. They will allow you to enjoy sacred time with your spouse to rekindle the flame and recharge your love.

Cherish each moment like this and create as many of them as you can because your marriage needs them! And after your next weekend escape let us know if these tips helped.

Fellas if you want to plan the perfect trip, check out www.mencanplantravel.com for great tips and deals!

BMWK family, what are your tips for making a weekend escape? How do you cut down on the stress? What’s your travel language?

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Homewood Suites and Home2 Suites by Hilton. I’ve partnered with them as a #WeekendEscapeArtist ambassador to empower men to become Travel MANagers! All content and opinions are my own.

 

About the author

Lamar Tyler wrote 2227 articles on this blog.

Lamar Tyler is co-creator BlackandMarriedWithKids.com. He also is the co-producer of the films Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me, Men Ain't Boys and Still Standing.

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3 Huge Mistakes Husbands Make When They Plan Travel and How They Can Fix It!

BY: - 5 Dec '16 | Marriage

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We recently ran an informal survey on our Black and Married With Kids Facebook page, and the results were interesting to say the least. We asked what your husband does wrong when he plans the family’s travel. And the ladies didn’t hold back. Let me guess, you’re not surprised, lol.

For the sake of husbands everywhere, I’ve curated a few of the top responses and have supplied tips on how you can avoid each one.  (In fact, I have recently partnered with Homewood Suites and Home2 Suites by Hilton to support their efforts to empower men to become Travel MANagers!)

As the primary travel MANager in my marriage, I speak from experience and from the heart when I tell men everywhere don’t slip up and make these same mistakes. I’ve already taken the criticism, nagging, heat in these areas. So follow this advice so you don’t have to take your lashings, too.

#1 –  Don’t Be Angry Dude

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Planning and executing a trip can be taxing, but don’t let that energy seep out during your travel plans. No one wants their romantic, stress-free outing or much-needed, fun-filled family vacation to be ruined by your bad mood. When you’re mad, you make the trip a drag for everyone.

When you travel, one of the most important things you can do is enjoy the moment. In our Facebook survey, one of my favorite comments said;

The best thing he brings is a fun attitude. He gets me to try stuff.

Husbands, I challenge you to be the C.F.O. (Chief Fun Officer) in your marriage. Husbands, this should be a role and responsibility we take on when we coordinate the travel for trips. Everyone knows that the husbands have more fun, are more romantic and we are the life of the party (sorry, ladies, you know it’s true, lol). So bring that party on your trip when you make the plans.

#2-  Don’t Choose Bad Hotels

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BMWK reader Chelsea said, “He chooses really bad (read cheap) hotels. He can no longer pick for us.” Choosing where to stay is one of, if not the most, important decisions you’ll make when it comes to planning travel.

He chooses really bad (read cheap) hotels. He can no longer pick for us. – Chelsea

Choosing the right hotel can ensure you have a sanctuary to return to after a long day or night of enjoying the town. I always look for comfort, cleanliness, great customer service and great value before I select where we’ll be staying.

For this reason, I chose Homewood Suites by Hilton for an upcoming trip we’re taking to Birmingham, Ala. The rooms at Homewood Suites are clean, comfortable and allow us to spread out whether we’re firing up the laptops to send off a few emails or sprawling across the sofa to watch a movie. It’s just the right mix. Plus, with the money we save by going with a great-value property like Hilton’s Homewood Suites, we’re able to factor in more great travel experiences, such as dining or attractions.

#3 –  Don’t Make Your Wife Plan All of the Travel

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Fellas, if you want to score some extra points, plan the travel for you and your bride. When you do the planning, it takes one more thing off of her busy plate. Believe me when I say she’ll appreciate you for it.

In our marriage, Ronnie handles most of the preparation with getting the kids ready for a week without us. So, I handle all of the travel…like a BOSS.

If you don’t believe me, check out what another wife on our Facebook page had to say about her husband planning the travel:

We are headed home after surprising my Mother-in-Love in Panama City, Fla., for Mother’s Day, then spending quality time together in Gatlinburg, Tenn. He planned everything (as he usually does) and did most of the driving. ALL good here!!

Now that sounds like a happy wife!

But just remember, fellas, just because we take the lead in this area doesn’t mean we shouldn’t heed lessons from our wives, like this wife from Facebook, who weighs the pros and cons of letting her husband take control of their travels:

Right: That Man can drive! Wrong: He won’t take directions! Lol.

Fellas, overall have fun with it. When you’re planning the travel, make the trip stress-free for the two of you and remember that each trip is an opportunity for you to strengthen your connection without the kids. So…Make it happen!

BMWK, did we miss anything? What are some of the things that husbands do wrong when they plan travel and how can they make them right?

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Homewood Suites and Home2 Suites by Hilton. I’ve partnered with them as a #WeekendEscapeArtist ambassador to empower men to become Travel MANagers! All content and opinions are my own.

 

About the author

Lamar Tyler wrote 2227 articles on this blog.

Lamar Tyler is co-creator BlackandMarriedWithKids.com. He also is the co-producer of the films Happily Ever After: A Positive Image of Black Marriage, You Saved Me, Men Ain't Boys and Still Standing.

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