Petty Petty Petty! 5 Things Husbands Do to Get the “King of Petty” Award

BY: - 28 Dec '16 | Marriage

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I know that sometimes, as men, we think our women can be the pettiest of the petty! Between the petty conversations they have with their friends and the passive aggressive stuff they do to us, we can get pretty annoyed. But if we are truly being honest, though, there are some petty things we can do as husbands from time to time as well!

Here 5 very petty things that husbands do to their wives that we just need to stop.  But don’t worry we’ve already discussed The Top 5 Petty Actions a Wife Can Do to Her Husband

1. Messing up after she’s cleaned up.

For instance, putting more dishes in the sink as she is about to finish them!  Now that’s super petty. She’s in her cleaning groove, it’s just a few dishes left in the sink until she’s done. Suddenly you decide you wanna pick up your old bowls and cups from all over the house and put them in the sink. She looks at you giving you the stare of death, because you, my friend, have committed a petty crime! Just know it’s at this very moment she wants to strangle you but she remains silent and finishes the task because she just doesn’t feel like arguing! You owe her one, or two, or three…..!

2. Joking about her parenting skills.

If it’s one thing we know, it’s that women are particularly defensive about their role of being a mother. If you are in any sort of group setting or around friends or family and you make a petty joke about something she does as a mom, just be prepared to be in the petty dog house. You might truly just be joking and mean nothing by it, but our women take mothering very personal.

3. Ignoring her when she is talking (aka… tune her out.)

I know I’ve been guilty of this. Sometimes your woman talks so much that you can find yourself being petty by tuning her out…especially when it’s something she has already said 1000 times! Fellas be honest…how many times have you shaken your head in agreement without actually knowing what she was saying? The “gotcha gotcha” though is when it’s something important and you have to go back and ask her about something that she just spent 10 minutes telling you about. Oops…just blame it on your petty ears!

READ: 4 Petty Habits Married Couples Just Need to Leave Behind in 2016

4. Saying “we need to talk” but then never talk!

As men, many of us already don’t do a whole lot of talking.  But if you say you need to talk and then she asks you to talk, and you say “oh, never mind.”  OOO-WEE that will burn her up! She thought maybe, just maybe you finally wanted to express yourself and in true petty fashion you shut her right back down. Let’s just call you Petty Pendergrass!

5. Always going tit for tat.

She forgot to do something or did something petty to you 2 weeks ago, so you do the same thing today. She didn’t appreciate something you did for her a few days ago… so you don’t do it the next time while lamenting: “see if I do that again.” Every time she asks you to be accountable to something you say “I would do X if you would just do Y!” Yeah, it’s petty more times than not.

Yes I know these aren’t the most mature things to do, but when you’re spending a lifetime with someone some petty moments are bound to happen. Just make sure the petty moments don’t surpass the loving ones!

BMWK Fam What are some other petty things we do to our spouses? Comment below!

About the author

Troy Spry wrote 225 articles on this blog.

Troy Spry a Certified Life, Dating, and Relationship Coach and the one and only "Reality Expert", resides in Charlotte, NC. He created his blog, Xklusive Thoughts, with the intent of putting out a very realistic perspective and using it as a vehicle for inspiration! He hopes to challenge people to think differently and inspire people to do and be better in relationships and in life!

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Married Couples: If You Smile in Public and Cry Behind Closed Doors, Read This

BY: - 28 Dec '16 | Marriage

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There are too many married faces, smiling in public and crying behind closed doors. This may be you or a couple you know. For sure, it was me and my husband early-on in our marriage. We had just as many bad days as we did good days.

Can you relate to any of these scenarios?

You’re leaving for work sad because of what is going on in your marriage…..but, you’re happy you are getting out of that house and away from your spouse for a few hours.

You’re fighting all the way to church, then smiling as soon as the car rolls onto the church parking lot.

You’re at a restaurant and you smile every time the waiter comes to serve your table and begin arguing as soon as he walks away.

These scenarios describe the smile in public and cry behind closed doors syndrome. And if you can relate to any of those scenarios, then you may be experiencing this syndrome in your marriage.

The Smile in Public and Cry Behind Closed Doors Syndrome

Many of us grew up in an era where you were taught whatever goes on in your house stays in your house. No matter what happens, you put on a smile and suck it up when you walk outside that door. In other words, you may cry behind closed doors, but when you exit that door you put on a smile because it’s nobody’s business what’s going on inside your home.

No matter what happens, you put on a smile and suck it up when you walk outside that door.

Well, I agree with that to an extent.  It’s true, everybody and their brother doesn’t need to know your business. However, if you run around with a smile as if everything is okay when your heart is really breaking, nothing gets solved.  And, nothing changes if you don’t get help.

Depending on the severity, this type of thinking could put your marriage in danger.  While everyone doesn’t need to know your business, help from the proper sources is definitely needed. The key is to find the help that begins the healing process.

The Importance of the ‘Right’ Support System

Total isolation, even in a marriage, is unhealthy. While a marriage is between a husband and wife, a healthy supportive community is beneficial. The goal is to be healthy physically, emotionally, spiritually, and financially as individuals and as a team. And having the right support system in place can help get you there.

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Here are 11 examples of people who can be a healthy part of your relationship.  

  1. Other healthy couples
  2. Supportive extended family
  3. Church marriage ministry
  4. Marriage counselor or coach
  5. Marriage books and literature
  6. Marriage teachings in person or video recording
  7. Marriage seminars and workshops
  8. Anger management sessions
  9. Personal counseling
  10. Personal development coach
  11. A confidant that is willing to uplift your marriage

I get it. It’s hard to trust, forgive, or even think about growing closer to your spouse when your heart is broken. Am I right? When your heart is wounded, your energies are focused on protecting yourself from pain. However, hearts can be healed and mended.

I’m not telling you anything that I haven’t experienced. Around year 5, my husband and I lived the smilie in public and  cry behind closed doors syndrome.  But we looked for and found support…we strengthened our marriage and we have been growing stronger ever since.  And we hope the same for you.

BMWK – Who do you have in your support system?

About the author

Deborah L. Mills wrote 182 articles on this blog.

Coach, AUTHOR, Speaker, WIFE, Mom, and GRANDMOTHER. That's the gist of who I am. I love people and love to see their life and relationships thrive. As a coach I am ready to support your dream when you don't feel like it. As an author and speaker I am ready to pour into your life so that you can live your best life now. I am a personal and executive coach. Together with my husband I also marriage coach. GO TO MY WEBSITE. THERE IS A FREE GIFT THERE WAITING FOR YOU. http://bit.ly/2deborahlmills

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