You’ll find one common theme in almost every marriage resource offered; intimacy is important in a marriage. I’ve even shared it pretty frequently in many of my posts. And it’s true, marriages need it. However, what I’ve learned in my relationship coaching is that it isn’t the solution for every marriage challenge that surfaces.
What Sex Doesn’t Do
When couples use sex to make up with one another after disagreements, they often find that it did not erase the disappointment or frustration that they were feeling. It just gave them a temporary reprieve. Sex also doesn’t replace a sincere apology for wrongdoings. And although it feels good, your challenges are still there when you’re done. Couples eventually realize that when they use sex to handle disagreements, it isn’t as good for their marriage as they thought.
Here’s What Sex Can Do
But there is good news! Sex may not fix everything in your relationship, but here are a few things it can do:
Creates a greater connection with your spouse.
Intimacy is more than just sex. All the things that lead to the bedroom are equally important. Things like having a physical attraction and desire for your spouse are also needed in a marriage. Touching, holding hands, and sharing kisses are those physical connections that remind you that you actually like one another.
Causes you to make time for each other.
You can’t be physically intimate when you’re apart. Whether it is planned or spontaneous, you are in the same space at the same time enjoying one another. When couples get busy with careers and raising children, intimacy easily shows up last on the list of priorities. When you’re intimate, you’ve shut everything else out and simply have one another.
Allows you to forget the cares of the world, even if just momentarily.
A lot of the problems we face in our marriages, sometimes, come from the stress we allow in our lives from external forces. If we aren’t careful, our work, family and personal pursuits of happiness can take over and keep us disconnected from our spouse. Intimacy, when done right, helps you to remain focused solely on your partner.
Provides a place of inhibition, vulnerability and creativity.
Intimacy with the person you love and trust most can be so freeing. You can be who you want and do what you want in those intimate moments with your spouse. You can be as creative, kinky and fun as you desire in that bedroom.
Couples, sex is great for your marriage. It can be healing, therapeutic and even a calorie burner. No, it won’t solve all of your marriage problems, but it will offer benefits that lead you both to a good, safe and happy place within your marriage. Be sure to be proactive in seeking realistic and focused solutions for your challenges. And use intimacy only for the pleasure it was created for in your marriage.
BMWK, what are other benefits of intimacy in a marriage?
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