3 Major Signs That the Man You’re Dating Just Isn’t Trustworthy

BY: - 3 Feb '17 | Single

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Trust is the cornerstone of any good relationship. If you don’t trust your man, it’s a major problem. When I decided to get married, I did it knowing that I truly trusted my man. And I mean “for real” trust, not that fake trust when you say you trust someone but you are still trying to scroll through his text messages kind of trust. I’ve honestly never had the time or energy for that fake trust.

But how do you know if someone is trustworthy?

Time and experience really are the best indicators. We usually get signs every day about whether or not we can trust someone. Unfortunately, we often choose to ignore most of those signs that are telling us the guy in our lives can’t be trusted at all.

But why ignore signs that are there to tell you to run the other way?

Because you want to see the best in people. You don’t want to jump to conclusions. And you believe that most people are inherently good. And those are actually not bad qualities to have. You should be well informed instead of walking around thinking that every guy you meet is a lying fool. But there is a difference between being cautiously optimistic and letting some dude play you for a fool.

Here are 3 signs that your man is not trustworthy. Don’t ignore them!

He’s cheated.

Okay, I hate to say that cheating means someone is automatically a loser because that isn’t true. People make mistakes. But cheating also tells you a lot about someone’s character and whether or not you can trust him.

It’s up to you to decide if you can accept his reason for cheating and if you believe the story about how and why it happened. But when you are in the dating stages and a man cheats, think long and hard about whether or not you truly have a future and if this man is worthy of your love. If he doesn’t respect your enough to stay faithful now, you have to wonder if he will be able to do so years down the line.

He lies about little the things.

Back when I was dating, I would always wonder long and hard about a guy that lied about little things like where he works, how much he makes, where he went to school, and all that stuff. Talk about signs of a pathological liar. A guy that lies about foolish details won’t hesitate to lie to you about the things that truly matter. That’s just a fact. So before you go making excuses for his “little” lies, you should ask yourself if you are okay with big ones because those are sure to follow.

READ: Got Trust Issues? Follow These 3 Tips to Pick Better Partners

You can’t depend on him.

Reliability and honesty go hand in hand. If your man tells you that he will do something or he will be there for you, he has to mean it and follow through. His failure to do so should tell you a lot about who he is. If I can’t depend on someone, it tells me that I can’t trust that person because he doesn’t always come through.

Do you want to spend your life worrying about if your man is going to do what he says he will do? Do you always want to wonder how much you can truly depend on him? I know I don’t. I’ve learned that a trustworthy man is often a dependable man. He means what he says and he says what he means.

Ladies…If these signs are consistently popping up in your relationship, don’t just ignore them.  The signs are there for a reason. If the man you are dating shows you that he isn’t trustworthy, don’t be afraid to walk away. Don’t continue to invest time in justifying his behaviors or his “little lies” and move on.

Despite what so many women believe, there is someone out there that is worthy of your trust.

BMWK ladies, what signs do you look out for to determine if your man is trustworthy?

About the author

Martine Foreman wrote 494 articles on this blog.

Martine Foreman is a speaker, writer, lifestyle consultant, and ACE-certified Health Coach who specializes in helping moms who want more out of life but feel overwhelmed and confused. Through her content and services, Martine is committed to helping women embrace their personal truth, gain clarity, and take action to create healthier, happier lives. For more on Martine's candid views on life and love, visit her at candidbelle.com. To work with her, visit her at martineforeman.com. Martine resides in Maryland with her husband, two kids and sassy cat Pepper.

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5 First Date Tips That Will Leave Him Wanting More

BY: - 7 Feb '17 | Single

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I’ve heard so many stories lately from people who have had what they thought were good first dates… only to never be contacted again. They get so upset because they felt like they put so much effort into the date and and yet here they are again back at square one. They wonder why this dating thing has to be so hard?!

Well the truth of the matter is that you have to realize that every person you date won’t turn into your soulmate. However, there are still some things you can do to increase your chances of that second date (and beyond!)

Ladies, here is insider knowledge on what you can do to leave him wanting more after your first date.

1. Be positive

Many of you are probably wondering what made this number one. Well, it’s because one of the things I hear most from men about their dates is that they are turned off by a woman’s negativity. You can be a ten in the looks department as well as other areas.  But if you have negative energy, men will flee.

If you have negative energy, men will flee.

If your conversation is about how bad the world is or how bad dating is or how bad your life is at the moment, then I’m here to tell you that no man wants to sign up for that! Men don’t want to walk into a relationship with the deck stacked against them or having to break down a bunch of walls you’ve built up from your past. Be conscious and honest with yourself about this.  If you aren’t in a positive space, then reconsider dating. Good spirits are contagious and your positive aura is definitely enough for a guy to want that second date with you.

2. Be an active participant

TNMCoupleDateDanceHappyMany men have told me that the one thing they hate on a date, almost more than anything else, is having to pull teeth in order to get anything out of a woman. It’s a massive turnoff when it seems like she is there as a favor to him and not because she really wants to get to know him. The foundation of any relationship is reciprocation, so don’t make the date just about you.

Offer to help with any planning, ask him questions about himself, offer to pick up the check (it won’t break your bank!), and most of all make it a conversation and not an interview. A man who really wants to make the date work will probably lead the way with planning and with picking up the check, but the kind gesture will at least make reciprocation the foundation.

READ: First Date Deal Breakers That Drive Men Away And How To Avoid Them

3. Utilize your feminine energy

I’ve had many of men tell me that their deal breaker for a woman was how HARD she came off on the date. Meaning, she was trying so hard to prove how tough she was that he couldn’t get to her softer side.

Nothing is sexier than a woman who exudes feminine energy. You know that flirtatious vibe, that subtle soft touch on the hand, that soul penetrating smile, and that slight movement placing the hair behind the ear so he can see your face. YES, that feminine energy is something serious and it makes men weak!

4. Look stunning and smell amazing

Some ladies say “if he can’t accept me at my worst, then he doesn’t deserve me at my best.” Well can you please not make that your mantra for the first date?! You wouldn’t go into an interview half-stepping, so don’t go on your dates half-stepping.

You wouldn’t go into an interview half-stepping, so don’t go on your dates half-stepping.

Be conscious of your appearance and remember that when you look good, you feel good…but you also want to be comfortable. And always remember that your distinct scent will follow that man from the time you arrive until after you leave. Stay on his mind even post-date with your signature scent!

5. Let your personality shine

I’ve been on a date with someone who was a stick in the mud and it wasn’t fun at all. Playing it cool and being extra conservative might be your first class ticket to no call back. Oftentimes, we have a tendency to want to hold back and be extra reserved on first dates. I’m not saying you should be over the top or over share, but at least let your personality shine through. Don’t turn it into an awkward and boring exchange just because you don’t want to “show your hand.” If you’re having fun, let that be known! Nothing replaces a good sense of humor and genuine smiles. Dates are least awkward when people allow themselves to be themselves.

Finally, understand that sometimes no matter how much you do, there still may not be a second date. Sometimes it’s just not a good fit or the right situation and you have to be okay with that. But this list will allow you to feel good when the date is over because you put your best foot forward!

About the author

Troy Spry wrote 225 articles on this blog.

Troy Spry a Certified Life, Dating, and Relationship Coach and the one and only "Reality Expert", resides in Charlotte, NC. He created his blog, Xklusive Thoughts, with the intent of putting out a very realistic perspective and using it as a vehicle for inspiration! He hopes to challenge people to think differently and inspire people to do and be better in relationships and in life!

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