4 Telltale Signs that a Man Is Serious About You

BY: - 17 Feb '17 | Single

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How do you know when a man is serious about you and your relationship? There are many actions that let you know that you are his one and only choice. If none of the following have happened, you may have a serious decision to make and very soon.

He’s Stopped Interviewing

If he’s still “considering other options,” it’s a good indication that he is not serious about your relationship. If he’s still “playing the field,” “sowing his wild oats” or any other colloquialism that means he’s not ready. When a man chooses one woman and settles with that one woman, his intent to build a solid foundation for a lasting love is evident by the nobility of his actions. Otherwise, a woman is just one among others “sharing the same dream.”

You’ve Met His Family

Men introduce women they’re serious about to their parents. If you’ve been dating for several months and you haven’t met his parents, he’s probably not serious about you….yet. What’s worse, is if you have introduced him to your parents. Arguably, one of you is “turning the page” faster than the other. Could he just be a “slow reader” or is your interest not mutual? Men want the blessing of their parents just as woman do. What his parents think about the woman he has chosen to love matters to a man.

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You’re in the Circle of Trust

Have you been properly introduced to his inner circle of friends, those whose opinion of you will matter the most to him? Contrary to what you may think about men, they do value what their close friends think about the woman in their life…when they have a serious interest that is.

Who have you met in “his crowd of influence?” Were these meetings intentionally arranged or just incidentals? Has he made a point to introduce you to any of his close friends or did you just happen to see a roommate while you were stopping by or ran into a friend of his while you were out and about, but not anything deliberate? You should be concerned if this is the case. More importantly, you should consider if continuing on in the relationship is in your best interest.

You Worship Together

Has he taken you to church with him? If he’s a man on faith, this will be important to him. Faith is a very important factor and plays a very significant role in how many of us live our lives daily and weighs heavily on major and minor decisions of our lives. So, he may take you to church to experience where is spiritually fed to make sure your beliefs and practices are compatible with his.

There are telltale signs when a man is serious about his relationship with his woman. The most prominent example should be his word matched by his actions. A worthwhile man will communicate his intent from the very beginning and not leave a woman wondering about her position in his life or the direction of their interactions/relationship. Any man that will do less than this is not worth a woman’s time and is a potential danger to her emotional wellbeing.

BMWK – what are other telltale signs that he’s serious about the relationship?

About the author

Derek Q. Sanders wrote 50 articles on this blog.

Derek Q. Sanders is the author of the newly released women’s guide to dating men, “Out-Dated: Rethinking How Men Date Women.” He is a certified life & relationship coach, blogger, public speaker, social commentator, and host of the BlogTalkRadio Show, “Writeous Talk on Love and Relationships.” Derek's mission is to foster strong healthy relationships by providing thought-provoking commentary that creates the atmosphere for dialogue that invites meaningful conversations between men and women to improve the quality of our relationships by finding and offering viable solutions.

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If You Can’t Be Yourself, You Are Probably With the Wrong Man

BY: - 22 Feb '17 | Relationships

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Few things are as uncomfortable for me as watching a woman, that I love, be someone that I know she’s not when her man is in the room. It bothers me to my core. And I know that when it comes to dating—particularly in the early dates—there is a tendency to put our best foot forward. I actually get that.

But that’s not what I am talking about here.

I am talking about those moments when she acts shy even though I know she’s not, or moments when she seems anxious or uncomfortable because of something her new love interest says or does. It makes me feel like something is wrong.

Those moments always make me wonder about what’s really going on. I sit and think, how is he treating her when no one is around? And despite those uncomfortable moments, I hesitate to say anything. I know how it goes when it comes to matters of the heart. My gut feeling is not reason enough to approach a friend about a man she seems to like. I need more than that.

So I just fall back and observe. I pay attention. I offer love and support. I give advice if she asks for it. And I wonder what compels some women to stay with men they can’t even be themselves with.

I wish there was a way for me to let all women know that you are fine just the way you are. Don’t change yourself for any man. And for any reason or excuse a woman may have for staying in a situation like this, I have a few things I want her to consider.

But I love him…

That may be true. But are you giving him a chance to love you for who you really are? Are you so scared that he might leave that you are doing what you think he wants so you don’t cause any problems? That’s no way to live. If you have to spend your relationship walking on eggshells, you may be with the wrong guy.

If I show him who I am, he might leave…

Then let him leave. You deserve better. If you have to fake it so your relationship can make it, your relationship won’t last. Regardless of any flaws you may have (and we are all flawed), your man should be able to take the good with the bad. He also shouldn’t make you feel like you are too flawed to be yourself. Tell him to step.

I don’t think I’m that different around him…

Hopefully anyone you call a true friend is honest and has your best interest at heart. If someone comes to with concerns about how you act around your man and you just aren’t buying it, check in with other people you love who have been around both of you and ask for their honest feedback. You may think one thing is going on, when everyone else is observing something else. Don’t ignore the observations of people you trust who have always had your back.

He’s such a great guy….

He may be, but that doesn’t mean he’s great for you. The guy that’s great for YOU will be the guy that you can completely be yourself around. And yes, that means your loud laugh, your love for food, your quirkiness and anything else that makes you unique. When you change yourself you please others, it means your confidence needs a boost. You need to realize how amazing your truly are.

I think we have a future together…

When it comes to happily ever after, I think it happens. Sure, all relationships have issues, but if two people are right for each other and put in the work, they can build something strong. But happily ever after can’t be built on a lie. You can’t suppress who you really are and expect that to lead to happiness. It just doesn’t work that way. It will only lead to a lifetime of frustration and sadness.

We are all unique individuals. That’s what makes us special. And I can tell you from experience that the best part of my relationship with my husband is the freedom that comes with being myself—at all times. I never worry about what he’s going to think or do based on my behavior. He doesn’t make me anxious or worried about shining in my own light. I get to be myself—flaws and all. I love that.

So ladies. Be your beautiful self—whomever that is. And when you are with a man and you start acting like someone other than who you are, you should seriously consider the possibility that he is just the wrong guy for you.

BMWK ladies, have you ever hesitated to be yourself in a relationship? What happened? 

About the author

Martine Foreman wrote 496 articles on this blog.

Martine Foreman is a speaker, writer, lifestyle consultant, and ACE-certified Health Coach who specializes in helping moms who want more out of life but feel overwhelmed and confused. Through her content and services, Martine is committed to helping women embrace their personal truth, gain clarity, and take action to create healthier, happier lives. For more on Martine's candid views on life and love, visit her at candidbelle.com. To work with her, visit her at martineforeman.com. Martine resides in Maryland with her husband, two kids and sassy cat Pepper.

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