30 Serious Consequences of Infidelity…Take Heed

BY: - 22 Jun '17 | Infidelity

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Infidelity is by far one of the worst things that can transpire in marriage.  Trust me, I know from personal experience!  It violates everything built between you and your spouse in such a personal way.  Majority of us who’ve been cheated on didn’t see it coming…I know I was blindsided for sure!



“I am deeply aware of the disappointment and hurt that my infidelity has caused to so many people, most of all my wife and children.”  – Tiger Woods

Infidelity felt like death to me, in more ways than one: the death of our trust, the death of our affection, the death of all the work we’ve done in our marriage.

There’s no doubt that infidelity negatively and deeply impacts marriages in the worst way.

Here are 30 consequences of infidelity:

  1. Your relationship with God could suffer from a break in fellowship.
  2. Having to seek forgiveness from God.
  3. Having to seek forgiveness from your spouse.
  4. Suffering from the emotional consequences of guilt.
  5. Spending numerous hours replaying the failure.
  6. Both you and your spouse suffering the emotional scars of this betrayal.
  7. Countless hours in counseling.
  8. Recovery will be long and painful.
  9. The pain will be deeply compounded by one’s own suffering and shame.
  10. Your marriage will suffer a break in trust, fellowship, and intimacy.
  11. You may be together, but feel excessive loneliness.
  12. The reputation of your family may suffer.
  13. Your kid(s) may be disappointed, confused, and may not forgive.
  14. Friends & Family may be disappointed and question your integrity.
  15. Job loss possibly resulting from emotional drain and the inability to focus and function.
  16. Family relationships are likely to suffer and even end.
  17. Divorce.
  18. Some folks may shy away from you and dissolve friendships.
  19. Being the bearer of such significant emotional pain to one another.
  20. An unwanted child conceived.
  21. Abortion of an innocent child conceived during the affair.
  22. Diseases exchanged and transmitted infecting the innocent spouse.
  23. Self-employed business owners may lose trust resulting in a loss of business.
  24. If one is in a leadership role it might be diminished in impact.
  25. Making marriage look like another bad statistic deterring people from getting married.
  26. Illnesses resulting from stress, depression, anxiety, & etc.
  27. Might have to start life over again.
  28. Perhaps a generational curse has been created.
  29. Loss of trust and intimacy (possibly forever).
  30. Death from disease and/or violence (domestic).

Well, this is quite a sobering list, yes? What’s even more sobering is that many people will consider these consequences and still turn a blind eye to proceed in self and spousal destruction.  The fantasy is more important to them than the reality.

The biggest benefit of this list may be in helping all of us infidelity proof our marriages, by realizing the need to set up strict safeguards to ensure that we are faithful in our marital commitment.  I can confidently say, if my husband and I had both known what adultery would do to us, our family, and our friends, we would have watched our wandering eyes, guarded our thought life, and avoided the situations that put us in harm’s way.

I think it is important to make mention that though we SUFFERED many of the above,  God saw us through and we are happily on the other side of infidelity.  So it is possible, and for that I wish to give hope to marriages going through this…that you can come out thriving on the other side.  However, trust me that you rather be proactive vs. reactive!

Infidelity is one of the easiest ways to damage a marriage.  The reason infidelity is the closest thing to impossible to resolve and work through is because it completely shatters the most basic foundation of a marriage: trust.

Infidelity can collapse even the strongest bonds and is especially dangerous because it has the power to destroy your marriage. Don’t cheat on your spouse, unless you’re ready for some major consequences!

About the author

Da-Nay Macklin wrote 53 articles on this blog.

Coach Da-Nay Macklin is a Certified Christian Life & Relationship Coach, founder of the Courageous Conquerors Mastermind and Author of Love After Adultery: The Breakthrough Journey of the Brokenhearted Available on Amazon She is one of the nation’s leading experts on infidelity and a thought leader on maximizing potential as she assists couples and individuals to live life by design and not default. Da-Nay has been has been featured on the Oprah Winfrey Network’s show Unfaithful: Stories of Betrayal after successfully navigating adultery in her marriage, and named one of the 15 most powerful women on the south side of Chicago. She now resides in Charlotte, NC with her loving husband and daughter.


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3 Ways Jay-Z’s Infidelity Confession Can Help You Save Your Marriage

BY: - 12 Jul '17 | Infidelity

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Beyonce instagram

So Jay-Z decided to add somewhat of a video postlude to his latest album “4:44” called “Footnotes for “‘4:44′” and the latest clip has set the internet, and maybe some marriages, on fire. In it, the rapper gets real about his less than perfect relationship with Beyonce and the fight to piece their broken marriage back together.

Claiming that his marriage was not built on “100% truth,” the Brooklyn reared superstar basically cops to the charge of infidelity leveled at him in Beyonce’s “Lemonade” album and discusses the challenges they faced trying to find their way back to each other. While Jay, born Shawn Carter, is no Dr. Phil, some of what he said might resonate with marriages and could offer a path to forgiveness that may help save relationships struggling to survive infidelity.

Keep It 100

“I just ran into this place and we built this big, beautiful mansion of a relationship that wasn’t totally built on the 100 percent truth and it starts cracking,” Jay states in the video. There are plenty of marriages that, taken at face value, seem impenetrable. They appear perfect and without defect. But when you take a closer look, the foundation isn’t solid and there are major cracks in the walls. If you can’t be real with your spouse and get to the 100% truth of what’s going on in your heart, your marriage won’t stand a chance. As Jay-Z puts it, “we just got to a place where in order for this to work, this can’t be fake…not one ounce.”

A post shared by Beyoncé (@beyonce) on

Fight for Life

“I’m from Marcy Projects…shot at…nothing’s harder than this,” he says. “By far, I’m telling you. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Putting a marriage back together after infidelity is no cake walk. As Jay points out, even being shot at can’t compare to what you have to go through to bring a marriage back from that hell hole. If either party isn’t all in for the battle of their married life, then the process is bound to fail. No matter who’s at fault, it’s going to be tough on everybody. Make a decision to fight for life and the person you have chosen to share it with.

Tear Down and Rebuild

“Then we had to get to the point of, ‘Okay, tear this down and let’s start from the beginning,'” Jay-Z continues. Yep. That about sums it up. When a marriage has been destroyed by infidelity, the relationship has to be torn down to its foundation and rebuilt brick by brick. Coming clean about your feelings and making the decision to fight are just the tip of the iceberg. The real work is in the day to day act of rebuilding. Trust has to be reestablished. Love has to be restored. An unbreakable bond has to be reconstructed. It’s going to take work. But, like Jay-Z says, “I’m not saying it wasn’t uncomfortable, because obviously, it was.” If your marriage has been upended by infidelity and you want it to survive, you’ve got to roll up your sleeves and get to work.

BMWK, is there anything that Jay-Z says that resonates with you?

About the author

Joann Fisher wrote 139 articles on this blog.

Joann Fisher has been a writer and editor for both print and online newpapers and magazines for the last 10 years. She now serves as a Writer/Editor at BMWK and lead Editor for The Joy Network.


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