3 Ways to Be Happily Single On Purpose

BY: - 20 Oct '17 | Relationships

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Too many people see being single as a “disease” that needs to be cured rather than a season of life or possibly even a calling for life. Some come right out and say it: “Girl, why are you still single? Can’t you find a man?” Or, “if you weren’t so picky, you would be able to catch a guy.”

Others are much more subtle.

They don’t speak so much of your singleness, but are always trying to hook you up with that guy that they say “you will just love.” All the while you are thinking: “If I need your help, I’ll ask. Until then, stay out of my dating life please.”

Is it possible for me to be single, maybe even stay single, and still be fulfilled in life? The quick answer to that is a resounding “yes.” You may not be married. You may not be dating. You may not even want to be dating. And, you can still be right in the middle of God’s perfect will for you.

Sometimes, it takes a while for people to find their purpose. If you’re single and still unsure of what in the world you’re here for, don’t lose heart. The Apostle Paul writes specifically to those who are not married in 1 Corinthians 7. If you are single, God hasn’t forgotten you. God isn’t overlooking you. In fact, God wants to use you in ways that He cannot use someone who is married. You may or may not be single all of your life. (Either is fine, by the way.) But for this season, while you are unwed, can you be happy? Can you be useful? By all means, yes! Here are three things you can look forward to!

Unexpected Freedom

Single people have a freedom that married people do not. This is not to say that a single individual cannot have a packed schedule. But usually, their schedules are filled with concerns that are limited to themselves alone.

On the other hand, married folks have many concerns that are primarily centered around family. Typically, the unmarried are free from some of those concerns. And, that is liberating. Since they do not carry as many of those responsibilities, you are free to take on other types of commitments. They can do things in ways that married people cannot.

Unencumbered to Serve Others

Single people have a tremendous opportunity to use their freedom to serve others in creative and exciting ways. Whether they choose to work with an established charity or start their own benevolent program, they will find a plethora of events where their hearts and skills are needed.

The good news is that serving other people is the most likely way to happen upon your purpose in life. The unexpected usually happens when you take your eyes off of yourself and begin to think of others.

Unmistakable Happiness

In 1 Corinthians 7:40 Paul ends the passage about being single by saying that the unmarried person is “happier if she stays how she is,” that is, single. Happier? Is that possible? Don’t single people miss out on things? Not if they are walking in obedience to the Lord. Because for each thing that a married person has that a single person doesn’t, there are other things that single people have that married people do not. You can be single and happy.

If you are single, you are not a second class citizen. You are not a second class Christian. If you are walking in obedience to God, He may use your single status in ways that He could not use you if you were married. Until God calls you to something different, stay single. Stay happy. On purpose.

BMWK, are you single and happy?

About the author

Joann Fisher wrote 121 articles on this blog.

Joann Fisher has been a writer and editor for both print and online newpapers and magazines for the last 10 years. She now serves as a Writer/Editor at BMWK and lead Editor for The Joy Network.

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Marriage Made Easy: 27 Stupid Simple Tips to Help Your Marriage Run Smoothly

BY: - 23 Oct '17 | Marriage

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Don’t we all wish there was an “easy” button for marriage? The moment something goes awry, we yank it out, press it, and voila! Problem solved. But, there is no such thing. Marriage is perhaps the most difficult relationship to navigate. It has the potential to yield the most rewards, yet cause the most pain…all in the same day.

Regardless of how difficult it is, people aren’t staying away from it. Financially, weddings drop 300 billion sweet ones into the global market every year. So, the idea of happily ever after is selling. However, after the wedding, the problems begin. And frankly, many couples don’t know how to deal.

Whether it’s poor communication, financial challenges, crazy in-laws, or infidelity, many marriages are plagued with the kinds of problems that begin with stupid simple mistakes. Issues that were swept under the rug when dating are now major grievances that need to be addressed. Thoughts that were once kept in check are now given free reign. Attitudes that were kept at arms length have permission to run amok.

So, what are some of these stupid simple mistakes and how can you keep them from destroying your marriage? We’ve compiled a list of 27 of the biggest ones and, in no particular order, have listed them below. Just remember, they’re called stupid simple for a reason.

  1. Remember to say please.
  2. Don’t forget to say thank you.
  3. Open the door for your wife.
  4. When your spouse speaks, you listen.
  5. Put down the toilet seat.
  6. A home cooked meal would be nice.
  7. Have a conversation over dinner.
  8. Put down the phone.
  9. Pray for your spouse.
  10. Say “I’m sorry.”
  11. Have sex as often as possible.
  12. Don’t cheat on your spouse.
  13. Pick up your clothes off of the floor.
  14. Keep having fun.
  15. Ask your spouse about their day.
  16. Say “I love you,” a lot.
  17. Remember their birthday.
  18. Let them know you believe in them.
  19. Don’t hide your spending.
  20. Tell them good morning.
  21. Call if you’re running late.
  22. A gift, just because, is sweet.
  23. Take a nice vacation or two.
  24. Remember and celebrate your anniversary.
  25. Check in at least once throughout the day.
  26. Don’t be a rogue parent.
  27. Talk “to” each other not “at” each other.

See what I mean? Stupid simple, right? Sadly, many of these very easy ideas often get neglected. And, in fact, many of these concerns are often downgraded to “pet peeves.” One may not be a problem. But string a few of them together and then leave them unchecked. Before you know it, your marriage will begin to spiral downward. Sometimes, when talking about the demise of their relationship, you might hear someone say, “Well, it wasn’t just one thing…” The “things” are beside the point. Overall, they just didn’t feel loved and taken care of.

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Many of these pitfalls are easily preventable because they are so easy to control. Regrettably, there is one culprit that usually stands in the way of a harmonious relationship. Both husband and wife can get caught up in their pride. Once that happens, really simple behaviors get caught in the crossfire and no one wants to give in. Pride must be kept at bay if these simple concepts are to take root and help your relationship flourish.

There are no easy buttons to fix broken marriages, but their are easy approaches to complex relationship issues. Whether the “issues” fall under the category of communication, faith, parenting, finances, fidelity or anything else, there are certain simple actions that should never be sidelined. They may seem stupid simple, but they work.

BMWK, what other really simple tips have helped your marriage succeed?

About the author

Joann Fisher wrote 121 articles on this blog.

Joann Fisher has been a writer and editor for both print and online newpapers and magazines for the last 10 years. She now serves as a Writer/Editor at BMWK and lead Editor for The Joy Network.

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