Have you ever met anyone who loves being nagged? I haven’t. Yet for some odd reason, people do it all the time. Maybe they think it’s a good way to get a point across. I think we all know that it isn’t, though.
And typically, television shows would have you believe that men are always on the receiving end of nagging, but that isn’t so. It goes both ways. I don’t think nagging has as much to do with gender as it does with personality.
So why do people do it so much if no one likes it? I think it’s because everyone wants to be heard. People think that the more they say something, the more the other person will hear what they have to say.
But that just isn’t true. Repeating a point doesn’t mean the message gets through. Some would argue that repeating anything too much could actually result in your message being ignored.
But for all my naggers out there… there is hope.
If nagging has become your way of communicating with your spouse, you really need to stop. By developing more effective ways to getting your point across, you will end up with a partner who appreciates life without the annoying repetition that comes from living with a nag.
Here are five reasons why you need to stop being a nag.
You aren’t being heard
The more you nag, the less your partner hears what you have to say. Nagging is annoying and it causes people to shut down. If you actually want your spouse to listen and process what you have to say, nagging is not the way to go.
It makes you less attractive
No one looks at a nag and thinks, you are so sexy right now! Very few things make you as unattractive as nagging does. Whether your nagging entails judging, complaining or dishing out orders, it’s a sure way to cause a serious drought in your love life.
It’s ineffective
People rarely make meaningful changes because they’ve been nagged into action. Nagging just makes the person on the receiving end very annoyed. It’s not effective, and it doesn’t resolve anything. And even it appears like it does, that resolution probably comes with resentment and frustration.
It makes your spouse avoid you
If my husband is even thinking about nagging me, I would be sure to find something to do or someplace else to be. No one enjoys being nagged, so nagging your spouse frequently will certainly encourage avoidance, ultimately leading to unresolved marital issues.
It’s exhausting
Being nagged is exhausting, but so is nagging. It takes a lot of energy to keep saying the same thing over and over again. It takes a lot of energy to try and annoy someone to action. It would be a lot less tiring (and a lot more effective), to develop communication strategies that can help you make progress in your relationship and finally be heard. After all, that’s what we all want—to be heard.
BMWK family, what are some reasons you think people need to stop nagging?