Ladies, stop listening to your friends! It’s tempting to want to talk to your girlfriends when you are having marital problems. But be careful. Your friends don’t always have your best interests at heart. Below are 9 reasons to stop listen to your friends regarding your marriage.
- They don’t know the whole story, just your version. They can only give you an opinion based on what you tell them. Are you telling them everything, are you even telling the truth?
- Unless they are giving you the Word of God, all they have to offer is what you is what they would or wouldn’t do. Because they are not you, that advice will not help you.
- They may not be happy in their relationship and therefore don’t want you to be happy in yours either. Misery loves company and unfortunately your miserable friend may want you to feel the way she does.
Related: 5 Marriage boundaries your family and friends should never cross
- They may be single and jealous that you have a husband. Be very careful with those friends; they definitely want to hear all about your marriage troubles. They may even try to convince you to leave your husband. If they have never been married, what advice can they give you anyway?
- Your friend may want your husband for herself. Yes this is possible, yes this does happen. She wants you to vent to her so she can be there to comfort your husband. Not saying all your friends want him, but there could be one.
- What goes on in your marriage is not your friends’ business. Some things are better discussed with your spouse or pastor/pastor’s wife or marriage counselor. Would you want your husband discussing your marriage with his friends?
- They may tell others what’s going on in your marriage. Unfortunately people like to talk about other folk’s problems. They don’t mind telling others what’s going on in your marriage. They may not discuss the good, but they will definitely discuss the bad. You don’t want your business out on the street.
Related: The art of keeping people out of your relationship
- They may tell your husband what you told them. Yes, there are some that may take what you told them to your husband. Don’t think your friends have your back and will automatically be on your side. These could be the one friends mentioned in #5.
- Your friends may not really be your friends. I know when you were a child, you were told that you can’t call everyone friend. This is true in adulthood as well. One or more of the people you call friends could secretly be jealous of you and not want to see you happy.
Don ‘t get me wrong, you could have a very good confidant in one of your friends that you talk to about your marriage. Just make sure you are getting the Word of God from her and not other advice that could ruin your marriage.
I cannot stress how important it is to talk to your spouse about what ‘s bothering you; but if you need to speak to someone outside your marriage, try a professional or your pastor.
BMWK family, what are your thoughts about listening to your friends regarding your marriage?