Flirting: Is it harmless or disrespectful?

Life coach Gail Blanke says that: “there’s no better way to grab someone’s attention..”   than to flirt.   In her article, Turn on the charm –get what you want, she says:

And it is a game — a fun game. I think we all ought to play it more. I mean, why not? We’re not talking Fatal Attraction here; we’re talking about tapping into a zillion-year-old art — the art of engaging the interest of someone we find interesting and delightful by being delightful ourselves.

 How do you draw the line between harmless flirting and being disrespectful to your mate?   I think the line is fuzzy and therefore, I do not flirt..or at least I try to make a conscious effort not to flirt.   In the article, they say you should make the other person you are talking to feel like a million bucks.   As a married woman, I think that would be inappropriate.   Please send me your comments on this topic.   Do you feel like it is OK to flirt to get what you want?