Question to the Moms: Is it just me or do you sometimes feel nervous when you leave the kids ALONE with Dad? I can’t be the only one….I’m guilty of subconsciously (and sometimes consciously) thinking that my intelligent, capable, lovable and attentive husband can’t fully take care of his own kids when I’m not around. WHY? There are several answers, some of which I will share, but for now I’m just trying to let go and let Dad!
I will admit. I’m a control freak. Like any mother, I know how I want our kids to dress, behave, eat (well) and not lose any limbs. Dad on the other hand will let the kids leave the house wearing plaids and polka dots (yes, at the same time) and clothes two sizes too small. Let’s not get started on my daughters’ hair. Oh Lord! If I know I’m leaving for a few days in a row, its imperative that I make sure the hair thing is on lock before I’m on my way.
There’s a lot to be said about his style of seeing after the kids as it compares to mine. For instance, when my husband decides to take the kids to the park, he puts them in the car and drives away. What’s wrong with that you ask? Nothing, except for the fact that there are no healthy snacks packed, no bottled waters and no change of clothes. It’s just him and the kids. While I find this remarkable, as they drive away, I’m thinking, “He needs this….and what if the kids need that….” Well, guess what? They will be fine and I’m sure they have whatever it is they need and probably want. I honestly just don’t see how he does it. Yet, when they return, the kids have eaten, they are tired (and dirty) and are extremely happy.
Dad’s approach to being a caretaker is so much different from mine. Yes, I get that I’m a nurturer by nature. I am a mother hen – a mother BEAR at times always protecting her cubs. He, on the other hand, has the same intentions, but shows it in a completely different way. The good thing is whatever Dad does, he must be doing it well, because the kids love their “Daddy time”! I believe there may be some frozen yogurt bribery involved, but nonetheless, my cherubs return home safe and sound, needing no more than an occasional dab of Neosporin and a Band-Aid.
No, he doesn’t keep hand sanitizer in his pocket, nor does he always have any wipes, but this doesn’t mean that he loves them any less or that they’ll catch a virus because Mommy wasn’t there. It just means that the man that the man you love has repeatedly shown how much he loves and cares for his children. All he needs a little slack and some occasional praise. So, when you see Dad with two little girls with fuzzy hair and clothes that are too small, just smile and wave and know that Mom must be out of town, but “Dad’s got it”!
P.S. Big shout to all of the Dads who do “it” – sometimes better than Mom. He cooks, he cleans and does a mean two strand twist with matching barrettes! I know you’re out there and I salute you!
BMWK – Do you secretly have control issues when Dad’s alone with the kids?