After a long day by both of us, my husband and I collapsed into the bed, exhausted. It was almost midnight, and I know my husband was tired from doing the whole dinner-bath-bedtime routine that he takes over when I have class at night. My head was throbbing from being too tired and not getting enough sleep the night before.
He had just gotten into the bed and was already drifting toward some deep sleep. I leaned in close and put my head on his pillow. He opened one eye and smiled at me.
I stroked his arm and said, “You know I appreciate you for all that you do for us.”
He smiled wider.
“I know it’s not easy being you, but I do notice all the effort you put into this family. I’m glad you’re here,” I said.
It was just that simple. From time to time, I make sure to stop what I’m doing, ask my husband to stop what he’s doing and focus on my words.
“I love you.”
“I need you.”
“Thank you.”
Usually, after one of these moments of appreciation, I can almost see his stress levels drop and he’s able to walk a little lighter.
We all want that validation that our spouse *sees* us, that they understand that what we do every day is not easy, but they appreciate us making that effort. Don’t get so caught up in the day-to-day business that you miss out on little opportunities to connect.
Go home today and make it a point to give your spouse a hug if you normally don’t. Kiss your wife/husband on the cheek and tell them that dinner was wonderful; thank her/him for making it. Throw on a slow song and dance in the living room together. Give them a massage before you head to sleep. Make sure they know that no matter how much is going on, you remain committed to them through it all.
What’s your favorite way to show your spouse that they are something special to you?