Imagine your colleague gets the promotion you have longed for or a friend meets the love of her life. You may try to put on a good front and say congratulations but deep down you feel jealous. We have all experienced feelings of envy at one time or the other. Some people turn to gossip, others feel depressed or a sense of lowered self-worth when this occurs. Often jealousy … [Read more...]
How to Heal from the Pain of Divorce and Learn to Love Again
2005 was the most painful year of my life. My daughter had just turned one when I found out that my husband—who I had been separated from for four months, with a faint hope of reconciliation—was about to have a baby by another woman. Words can't express how devastated I was at his admission of an affair during our marriage. I felt like I had fallen into a black hole and wasn't … [Read more...]
Three Lies Married People Tell About Forgiveness
for·give verb \f?r-?giv, fo?r-\ : to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)- Merriam Webster At some point in your marriage your spouse will hurt you, usually unintentionally, but we are human and sometimes that humanness gets in the way and we hurt one another through words or actions. In order to move past the pain and … [Read more...]
Why Apologizing When You’re Wrong is Right!
By: Ticily Medley Many articles have been published on the importance of forgiveness and its positive impact on healthy adjustment. Some people believe that forgiveness is imperative in order for one to experience “closure” following a hurtful event. Others believe that forced forgiveness can be more detrimental to one’s mental health and social relationships than helpful. … [Read more...]
Finding Closure after “It’s over” by Letting God Take the Reins
Walking around with heaviness from having not fully addressing my break up in a matured way, the Holy Spirit prepared me to speak to my ex. I got a heads up in my spirit about him contacting me and shortly afterwards I received an email from him asking to meet up with me later on that week. I was nervous and yet thankful, because in that moment I believed that God was giving me … [Read more...]
Do You Know What Forgiveness Really Is?
Forgiveness is not justification for inviting, permitting or rewarding continued violations, offenses or abuse. Forgiveness does not absolve you of your responsibility to honor, esteem, respect — and protect — yourself. You can let go of anger, bitterness and resentment, forgive debts and forget losses, and pardon or excuse violations and poor treatment without staying in … [Read more...]
4 Misconceptions about Forgiveness that Affect Your Marriage and Life
Many truths and misconceptions surround the word forgive or forgiveness. We need the truth, but misstatements and misconceptions can get us off track.There are many definitions for the word forgiveness or forgive. Most times our definition comes from our life experiences and upbringing. It comes from our history. No matter the definition the dictionary gives, our personal … [Read more...]
I Had to Learn How to Forgive, So I Could Get Past the Hurt
One day at bible study my pastor was teaching on how we're called to forgive folk since Christ forgave us. And since I’ve never fully understood that, ya'll know me…I raised my hand like "church folk are always talking that forgiveness stuff like it's SO easy to do. It’s much easier said then done." And my pastor shot back that forgiveness isn't hard to do, it's getting past … [Read more...]
How to Recover from Mistakes You’ve Made in Your Marriage
Have you ever lied, used your words inappropriately, or did something to your spouse you now deeply regret? We’ve all been there at some point, where a decision we made was more self-serving than it was beneficial to the relationship. Watching a spouse deal with and process that hurt is heartbreaking for anyone who truly cares about the person they're involved with. The natural … [Read more...]
Learn to Say These 2 Words and Heal Your Marriage
Words are powerful. They can make or break a relationship. For some people, it's really difficult to tell their significant other “I love you,” or “I’m sorry,” or even “I was wrong.” But, I'm not writing about those phrases today. In my experiences of ministering to women and couples, I've found some of the hardest words for spouse's to say to each other are "I'm … [Read more...]
How Not to Be Offended By Every Little Thing Your Spouse Does
There are many elements of a healthy marriage. Some of them are unique to your specific relationship. However, forgiveness is one of those things that is a part of every healthy marriage. As spouses, each of you does things on a daily basis that can offend the other person. Husbands - a harsh word that feels unnecessary. Wives – a sharp short answer that could have been … [Read more...]
‘Black Nativity’ Review: Family, Faith and Forgiveness
Black Nativity is a great addition to your movie-going plans this holiday season! It is a family-friendly film with something for everyone to enjoy. The film is a contemporary adaptation of the original Black Nativity play written by acclaimed poet, Langston Hughes. Black Nativity is a story that centers around Langston Cobbs (Jacob Latimore), a rambunctious teenager who is … [Read more...]
When It Comes to Our Spouses, Why is Forgiveness So Hard
"Ain't asking for forgiveness for my sins..." - Jay Z I wonder, how many of us are asking for forgiveness from our sins? Not only asking for forgiveness from God for things we've done, but asking for forgiveness from our spouses if we've wronged them. Webster defines forgiveness as "to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offense or debt." Did ya'll … [Read more...]
3 Ways Forgiveness Heals You
Has someone hurt you and you can’t seem to move past it? Do you want to seek revenge so that person can feel the pain they inflicted on you? If you answered yes, let me encourage you to forgive them instead. Holding on to the hurt and anger for an extended period of time can damage your well-being and keep you in bondage. You may ask.... what’s in it for you to forgive someone … [Read more...]
Now That You’re a Parent, Have You Forgiven Your Parents?
My father was around during the early years of my life. I don’t recall his presence being significant, but he was around. As I entered middle school, I saw less and less of him. Eventually, I didn’t see him at all between the ages of 12 and 16. At 16 I saw him once, and 6 years later I learned that he passed away. My father was a flawed man. That I know for sure. But, … [Read more...]