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The Most Important Characteristic in a Great Spouse

Growing up watching war movies with my dad was the highlight of our relationship. I remember like it was yesterday when we went to the movies to see “Saving Private Ryan”. That wasn’t my favorite in comparison, to Braveheart with Mel Gibson. These movies illustrated what a leader looks like. Strong. Resilient. Brave. Courageous. Fearless. Victorious. I went from those movies thinking a leader never shows fear because if you’re weak then others will not follow you. These movies taught me to hide what I was really feeling and suck it up because that’s what leaders do.

I took that very same thinking into my marriage with the understanding that the bible calls me as the Husband to lead my home. But, there was one characteristic that I didn’t pick up from those movies. It wasn’t until I learned that Christ is the epitome of leadership. He embodied all of those qualities to the highest degree, but there is one quality that trumps all of them.

That is the quality of servanthood. As a servant you put the interests of others before your own. You are fully devoted to the care of those with you. This is how Christ leads. He didn’t come to the Earth to be served, but to serve. He teaches us, that it is in our weakness that we are strong. We do not have to fear that others will not respect us when we show our weakness because our leadership is not leading to victory, but leading from victory which is Christ’s victory on the cross. We lead from His example. We lead from his accomplishment. We lead as Christ leads us.

Here are 5 ways to serve your spouse with the heart of servanthood:

1. Pray for your spouse each day.

2. Listen to your spouse during times of disagreements, and use kind words.

3. Speak your spouses love language with action.

4. Find out what makes them happy, and plan opportunities for them to do it.

5. Do what they enjoy doing even if you don’t enjoy it.

BMWK, can you think of anymore ways to serve your spouse?

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