This question was raised recently as a wife stumbled through the laundry list of actions she does to contribute to her marriage. Items like cooking, child-rearing, cleaning and sex all made her list. She was overwhelmed by the idea of it all. It definitely was a valid point to be made as many wives struggle to balance the various hats we tend to wear. Which occasionally leaves us wondering about the proportionality of our most sacred union.
If you find yourself in a marriage whose equilibrium is slightly off, definitely communicate your needs to your partner. On the other hand, if you’re just a little flustered about all you feel you’re giving up for your marriage, let’s talk.
We have to first recognize that marriage was a choice. Accepting the invitation by saying “yes”, to selecting the wedding dress and walking down the aisle, were all because we wanted to be a wife. Understanding some married young and may not have been clear on all of the expectations. However, many of us knew what we were saying yes to.
In my opinion the problem arises when the focus is seeing a wife’s role as cumbersome. If we think of any of our responsibilities as chores, we’ll treat them as such. Who wants to do chores? We do them because we have to. What if, instead, wives viewed marriage as a blessing and what we contribute as the icing on the cake.
If we were to breakdown a list of “wifely” duties, let’s see what we come up with. Who ever said cooking was strictly a wifely duty? Couples can share in this responsibility. We can make it even more enjoyable by doing it together when we can. Both child-rearing and cleaning fall on the shoulders of both partners. The sooner wives stop trying to be superwoman and ask for help, the better. Lastly, sex. Sex is not a chore, but an experience both partners should eagerly anticipate.If you do not, then it’s time you had a hot and steamy conversation about what really turns you on. In marriage, however, each of the above are actions we should look forward to. They are significantly contributing to our family and our lives. Ultimately, marriage should feel like a blessing.
Again, there are many benefits of marriage. The major blessing is that we found love.
We established a love connection with someone who was willing to accept our good, bad and ugly and still want to share their lives with us. This isn’t always easy. Some people have spent a great portion of their lives searching for what married couples have. We need not take that for granted. Of course it isn’t always as sweet as it sounds. There will be challenges as there are with every other part of our lives. By using our communication skills and the resources available to us, we can work through anything.
BMWK, what benefits do you think a wife receives in a marriage?