If you weren’t watching OWN (the Oprah Winfrey Network) this weekend then you missed an enlightening interview. Iyanla Vanzant’s show “Iyanla Fix My Life” made its debut. The Show had been promoted for weeks and if you had been a viewer of Oprah’s Life Class you are already aware of the powerful work Iyanla Vanzant does in transforming lives.
Well, her new show wasn’t any different. This premier 2-part episode featured Evelyn Lozado of Basketball Wives. We know Evelyn from her tirades on the popular reality show.
Iyanla, as always, asked thought provoking questions and wouldn’t let Evelyn off the hook about being “a thug among women”, her relationship and being honest about who she truly is. Evelyn’s marriage to Chad Johnson was one of the many topics discussed. Iyanla, in so many words, told Evelyn that her marriage was in trouble. Keep in mind the part 1 interview was just a few weeks prior to the alleged incident of domestic violence.
Iyanla stated that their marriage was in trouble because Chad is the head of that family and Evelyn doesn’t even know where she is being led. How scary is that? We always find varied opinions whenever the subject of leading in a marriage comes up. There are my independent sisters who feel strongly about there not being a leader in a marriage and then there are my other sisters who apply biblical principles to guide their marriage which allows them to trust their husbands as the head of the family, (I fall in the latter category). But can you imagine being in a marriage where the husband is trusted to lead and the wife doesn’t know where she is being led? I can’t.
One of the reasons my marriage works is because I completely trust my husband to guide our family. Here are just a few of the reasons why:
1. He is continuously strengthening his relationship with God. Because he is active in our church, makes Godly decisions regarding us and shares his testimony and the goodness of God with his friends all make it easy for me to trust him in this area.
2. He loves his family. I can rest assured that any decision he makes (even it doesn’t quite work out the way he planned) is because of his love for us.
3. He fully accepts his responsibilities as the head of our household. He never looks for a way out; he takes his rightful position always, without question. This gives me confidence that we, as a family, is headed in the right direction.
I can’t imagine being in a marriage with a man I can’t trust and whose intentions and plans for our family aren’t established. Unfortunately, Iyanla seemed to be on point in regards to Evelyn’s marriage. It is my hope that as Evelyn heals and begins to move forward, she remembers the lessons Iyanla shared with her.
BMWK, Where Are You Being Led in Your Marriage?