We know it’s not natural to respond to someone with love when they are acting petty, shady or resentful. But it’s more rewarding to reply with love than responding with the same resentment.
It’s easy to take our spouse for granted because they are with us day in and day out. It’s easy because we know that no matter what, they are the one person who will love us to our core.
Personally, I feel like it’s inevitable that we will drive our spouse crazy from time to time. After days, months and years of being together, boundaries tend to be crossed from time to time. And I’m not talking about serious, life-threatening boundaries. I’m talking about petty, harmless but still irritable boundaries. And left unchecked, these can lead to petty arguments, which can then lead to bigger ones. The lack of petty arguments can be the difference between a happy marriage and one that’s not.
Here are three petty arguments married couples need to stop having today:
1. The toilet seat petty
Okay, seriously, how long are you willing to keep having this same argument? At some point, you just need to accept the fact that some things won’t change, and it’s okay. Leaving the toilet seat up should not be cause for continuous arguments or divorce. Ultimately, what started out as something small, festers into larger issues/arguments. In the grand scheme of things, is it really worth it?
2. The “nothing is wrong” petty
I admit, I was the queen of throwing shade and ‘tude when I was upset at my hubby. As opposed to just coming out and saying what was wrong, I had delight in stomping around and giving him the silent treatment all while saying, “nothing was wrong”. Seriously, that did nothing for either of us. As much as our spouses love us, they will never be able to read our minds. Choosing not to discuss something that’s bothering you is just plain petty.
3. The “I did it last time” petty
Stop keeping score. Marriage is not a game or a match that someone needs to win. Marriage is about compromise. Things don’t always work out the way we want them to and things aren’t always “fair”. Marriage is about service, and part of being of service is to do what you can, when you can without pointing the finger of what your spouse hasn’t done for you lately. I promise when you change your mindset around this, you’ll invite a lot more happiness into your marriage.
I’m sure there can be more added to this list. But these are the ones I hear about most often (and the ones I’ve been guilty of myself). I’ve challenged myself long ago to stop engaging in petty arguments. I’ve wasted valuable time, and I’m sure if you’ve been married longer than a day, then you have too. But the good news is: you can put a stop to it too 🙂
BMWK: What petty arguments are you guilty of engaging in your marriage?