By Cassandra Paul
This year my husband and I will be celebrating 19 years of marriage. Four daughters and a lifetime full of challenges later and we are more “in love” today than when we first said I do. In fact, I’m realizing back then, we were in love with the “idea” of love. Since then our union has been tested, tried, rocked and rolled. And now we both understand that love is not only a noun but an action verb. And to love someone effectively through it all is a constant choice.
Committed to Discipline
In any situation, commitment will always require discipline. Commitment in marriage is no different. There is always someone that looks better, earns more money, is smarter, more talented and skilled than you are. Attraction and Temptation for someone other than your spouse is inevitable. Does that mean we keep leaving the one to try others? Absolutely not! It takes discipline to be able to walk in other scenarios; RUN away from people you feel a sexual connection to. It is why I resolve to continue saving myself for marriage.
I enjoy that my husband has his own private retreat between my legs.
I wish I could say the longer you are married the easier discipline is. It’s actually quite the opposite. We as individuals in a marriage are constantly growing and evolving. Oftentimes at different rates and speeds. It would be easy to open your life, heart and body parts with others that seem to have more in common with you at the time. “Secret lovers”, “Keeping it on the down low” and being “Down with OPP” aren’t new concepts and lifestyles. It takes discipline to save yourself for YOUR spouse in YOUR OWN marriage.
His Pleasure is My Delight
I enjoy that my husband has his own private retreat between my legs. He has his own personal playground to have fun, explore and discover without the concerns of someone else playing there as well. I take pleasure in knowing that while there are always opportunities available for me to share his fantasy island; I choose to save myself exclusively for him. His pleasure, his enjoyment and his delight are mine as well.
When your husband knows that you as his wife continue to save yourself time and time again, only for him, not only does he continue to trust you, he begins to reveal the most intimate, vulnerable sides of who he was, currently is and is becoming. He knows other men are attracted to you. But every time you save yourself for him, it reassures him, strengthens him, and strokes his ego. And he in turn, with all of that power and wonder……he strokes yours! Enjoy!!
BMWK, wives are you saving yourself for your husband?
Cassandra Paul is the wife of one man for 19 years and mother of 4 beautiful daughters. She currently works as a Project Specialist for an Alternative Youth Program and has taught for over 10 years grades K-12. She is the Creator of Two Social Clubs S.A.S.S.Y Circle (women’s group 18+) and Lighthouse Love where she seeks to encourage Marriage Couples to stand up, be visible in the community as they learn how to grow closer together. She is the author of a book launching in March 2015, “It won’t be because I didn’t tell you!” Specifically written in love for girls ages 12-21 and their parents.