During a recent trip to my hometown Chicago, a fraternity brother planned a hang-out: dinner at a Mexican restaurant at Navy Pier with views of downtown Chicago’s skyline, followed by a boat ride on Lake Michigan complete with a fireworks show launched from the water.
Our evening began at 7 p.m. I dressed up a pair of jeans with one of my favorite button-down shirts. I didn’t have to considering I was heading to a tourist destination, but I wanted to. I was out on the town and I was bringing my baby with me. Because we were going to be on the water I suggested she wear jeans also. She chose a pretty white shirt dotted with colorful butterflies and a jean jacket to complete her look.
Fast forward a couple of hours: midway through the boat ride and prior to the fireworks, she was curled up in a ball on my lap, siphoning off as much heat as she could from me. Quiet as kept, I was freezing in my favorite button-down shirt doing my best to absorb the little amount of heat she was generating as well.
After an evening of holding open doors, paying for food, holding hands, fireworks and having great conversation it suddenly dawned on me””my five year old daughter and I were on a date. Not “playtime,” someplace where kids go, but legitimately out on the town where I would normally take my wife. I leaned over into my little one’s ear and told her, “You know we’re on a date, right?”
“I know, Dad,” she answered, calmly.
My night was made. What made it even more magical was the fact that my fraternity brother and another mutual acquaintance””two African American men and fathers, one with two daughters and another with his young son, were there doing the exact same thing. We bonded. Our children bonded. We all bonded and had a good old time doing it.
In my book DAD: As Easy As A, B, C – 26 Dos and Don’ts for Fathers, I stress the importance of spending well thought-out, quality time with your children. A father is the first “Man” a little girl should have, the first example for how a man should treat a woman. Although there is no way to ensure or predict the decisions our girls will make as adults, while they are still young fathers have the chance and obligation to show them how it’s done””before they get out into the real world.
Dads how and why do you spend quality time with your daughters? When you are out with your sons do you explain or show them how a man should treat a woman?