By Tiya Cunningham-Sumter
Did you know a magazine existed (currently on newsstands) called “Divorce Magazine”? Well, I had no idea. Imagine my surprise as I am leaving the grocery store and there it was ready to be grabbed; and it was free. I wondered how much could be said about divorce that warranted an entire magazine. I don’t doubt that going through a divorce is one of the most difficult life transitions a person can experience, but my immediate reaction was “Where is the Marriage magazine?” was my immediate reaction.
As I skimmed through the articles, extras and resources in this publication, I imagined how each could easily be applied to marriage.
The Articles:
One of the articles suggested goal setting and the creation of mission statements to act as a guide through the process of divorce. The main idea was to focus on inspirational thinking and not get stuck in negativity. Marriages also benefit greatly from this type of planning. Couples can create statements together and review them at least once a year to make sure they are putting into practice the goals they deemed as important in the mission statement.
Another article presented ideas on preparing for the changes life normally takes during and or after a divorce. Well, in marriage life changes such as illness, loss of a job, or changes in finances threaten the strength of our unions. Having a plan in place helps to successfully navigate through many of those roadblocks.
Yet another article focused on the most common divorce questions. Married folks need a safe place to ask those tough questions that often surface in our relationships.
The article that stood out to me the most was one on how to deal with anger. Yes, there is anger when a person’s heart is broken and they feel like they may have failed in their marriage. But frequently there is anger in marriages also, when one disagrees, or doesn’t know how to handle disappointment. So it’s important to take inventory of those feelings and deal with them in a healthy manner.
The Extras:
Even the extras and the events listed in this publication were insightful and easily transferable to a marriage.
A quick quiz on a financial health check up can and should be applied to the lives of the married on a daily basis.
Some of the courses and seminars listed were focused on providing resources for women. I am sure I don’t have to sell you on the ideas of workshops and events geared toward building a healthy marriage. The benefits include leaving with new ideas on improving your marriage and gaining a positive energy that comes from being in the midst of other couples who have similar goals.
The Resources:
The professionals listed in this publication of course were lawyers, mediators, accountants and therapists. With the exception of the lawyer all of the professionals listed above can not only help during divorce, but also assist in helping couples build a successful marriage. A basic internet search revealed few magazines totally geared toward marriage and I have yet to see many on the newsstands in my neighborhood.
To have all this information in one resource on a monthly or quarterly basis could change and save 100’s of marriages. Had there been more marriage related magazines there more than likely wouldn’t be that big of a need for a divorce magazine.
BMWK, what would you like to see in a marriage magazine?
Tiya Cunningham-Sumter is a Certified Life & Relationship Coach, Founder of Life Editing. Tiya was featured in Ebony Magazine in the October 2008 and November 2010 issues. Tiya recently created and launched (Tuesdays with Tiya) Life Editing Radio show on blogtalkradio.com. She resides in Chicago with her husband and two children.