If you are a wife and a mother, chances are you regularly play on #teamtoomuch. You have 101 things to do, and it never seems like there are enough hours in the day to get it all done.
It’s exhausting.
And sadly, it gets more exhausting for so many of us during this time of the year. Cooking, cleaning, working, shopping—the to-do list never seems to end. And we can’t just wake up one day and decide that we want no part of the busyness because it’s too much. That’s not what good moms and wives do, right?
And listen, I get it. I’m a wife and a mom, and I know how overwhelming it can get when we try to juggle all the responsibilities in our lives while working to keep the people we love happy. It’s a lot!
But I also know the damage that awaits us if we don’t take a step back, look at our lives closely and make self-care a priority. It may seem selfish to focuse on yourself when everyone needs you but it’s not.
It’s actually the very best thing you can do for yourself and your family.
When we fail to put ourselves first, we can’t take care of our bodies, minds and spirits. We end up feeling depleted and sometimes discouraged. I guarantee that’s not the version of yourself that you want your family to get.
A lack of consistent self-care can lead to…
- Exhaustion
- Stress
- Anxiety
- Being Overwhelmed
- Depression
- Poor nutrition
- Lack of exercise
- Weight gain
- Anger
- Moodiness
Now a stressful week or month won’t result in all of these conditions, so I certainly am not trying to alarm anyone. But when neglecting self-care is your norm, and it becomes your way of life, you will slowly see these things creep up.
It’s not sudden, so we often don’t see it coming. We just move through our lives and keep on going because that’s what we do. We feel stressed out or sad, but we blow it off because we think we need to snap out of it. Busy moms and wives don’t have time to slow down because they feel tired, sad or stressed. We keep going, right?
Wrong!
We can’t just keep going. We can’t continue to neglect our physical and mental health because the people we love need us. When we do that, we end up turning into a HOT mess. We lose sight of who we are and what we want from life. We become too tired to think straight and can’t even recall what it means to relax and be still.
And do you know what this does to your family unit?
It damages what you are trying to build.
Being exhausted and stressed out and overwhelmed doesn’t serve you or anyone you love. It affects your mood. It changes how you interact with your children and spouse. It reduces how much patience you have. It leaves you feel frustrated and sometimes unappreciated.
In the long run, you suffer, and so does everyone in your family.
Sure, you do all that ripping and running for them. You want them to feel happy and safe and loved. And maybe at first, you are doing just that. But it doesn’t last. Running on an empty tank changes who you are, and it starts to take away from why you are doing so much for them in the first place.
So step back. Ask for help. Go to therapy. Say “no” to a few more things. Rest. Breathe. Be still.
Just because you have super powers doesn’t mean you need to use them all the time. You can just let those powers rest and enjoy being a mere mortal. After all, those days as a mortal are what makes life so amazing.
BMWK, moms are you guilty of not putting yourself first? Do you think you’ll be able to refocus on yourself? why or why not?