by Aja Dorsey Jackson
Last week a Florida man landed in hot water when he boarded a school bus to confront students who bullied his disabled daughter. According to stories about the event, a few students on the bus put open condoms on his daughter’s head and hurt her by slapping her and twisting her ear. The father, James Jones, got on the bus and said “This is my daughter and I will kill the &%*$% who fought her” along with some other choice words to the children and bus driver.
Parents got up in arms and the father was jailed and charged with disorderly conduct. Some parents complained that their children had been traumatized by the whole ordeal. There has been controversy over whether the father was right or wrong in his actions, but as a parent hearing this story I know that I probably would have done the exact same thing.
I am typically a laid back person but-*putting on my angry black woman voice*- let somebody mess with my kids and see what happens. Not only do I think that this father had every right to defend his daughter, I believe that it was his duty to defend his daughter who has cerebral palsy and likely cannot defend herself.
Many have argued that he should have gone through the proper channels such as law enforcement or the school first, and maybe he should have, but on the other hand I think there are some instances where kids need to feel some good old fashioned fear in their hearts. I can only imagine what this father went through emotionally when his daughter came home and told him how she had been treated. What would you say to your child in that instance? Would you tell your child that you are sorry that it happened and that you are going to have to talk to the principal, and wait however long for a hearing and whatever disciplinary action that the school may or may not take while she continues to be harassed on the bus? Or would you recognize that your child needed to see someone standing up for her and to let everyone else know that you would do whatever it took to protect your little girl.
Rather than getting upset that their child may have been scared by this father, parents need to be upset that their kids were picking on this girl. Yes, there were other kids on the bus who weren’t involved in the incident, but as a parent I would think I could let my kids know that if they weren’t involved that they had nothing to worry about and if they were involved that they wouldn’t have to be scared of Mr. Jones because I would be handling them first.
As a culture, I believe that parents have come to rely so much on authorities, the school, the social workers, law enforcement, etc. that we make criminal offenses out of what used to be called good parenting. There once was a time when you were supposed to be afraid of somebody’s daddy, so much so that you knew that messing with his daughter was going to get you a potential beat down. I feel like more and more we are raising children that they don’t have to be afraid of anything which is why they continue to behave the way they do. Now not only are we showing kids that consequences are null and void, we are showing that parental authority has no place, and I think that is a dangerous message that we continue to send. I personally applaud Jones’ actions and I believe that if more parents were willing to be directly involved rather than handing over every problem to the schools we would be raising better children.
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Do you believe Jones was justified in his actions? What would you have done in his situation?
Aja Dorsey Jackson is a freelance writer and public relations consultant in Baltimore, Maryland. Find out more about her at www.ajadorseyjackson.com or follow her on twitter @ajajackson.