by Tara Pringle Jefferson
Somehow, when I first got married, I mistakenly thought that since we lived together, we get more than enough quality time without even trying. However, as I’m sure you have figured out, that isn’t always the case.
It can be hard to simply find time for each other. Even though we live in the same house and see each other every single day, there can be times when we’re so preoccupied with everything else – the kids, the level of cleanliness in the house, our work, family problems – that we haven’t had a meaningful conversation in a few days.
That is no good.
I realize when we start simply existing with each other – more like roommates than partners – we end up bickering more and laughing less. We always try to check ourselves, and give the other a nudge when we feel communication could be better, commitment to the relationship could be strengthened
Whatever your job is and whatever other responsibilities that are on your plate, make sure your spouse doesn’t get the short end of the stick. Here’s a few ways to carve out time where you think there isn’t any:
- Cuddle in the morning before the kids wake up. Set your alarm 30 minutes early if you have to.
- Cuddle at night. Call it a night early and spend some time leisurely reading magazines, catching up on Law & Order – whatever is fun for you two.
- Text throughout the day that you love them, or to tell them about a funny thing that just happened at work.
- Facebook chat during your lunch break.
- If you can swing it, take a half day of vacation and go spend the afternoon with your spouse, just because.
- Eat dinner together AFTER the kids go to sleep.
What are some ways you stay connected with your spouse?
Tara Pringle Jefferson is managing editor of BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com. She’s also the author of Make It Happen: The Young Mommy Guide To Creating The Career You Crave. Follow her on Twitter or check out her blog for her insights on what it means to be a mom, wife, student, writer, and about three other labels she’s too tired to remember.